Mikester

From that other store’s boxes of misfit toys.

filed under Categories misfit toys 6 Comments

So here’s a thing I didn’t know existed until it turned up in these boxes of another store’s stock we recently acquired:


The Manara Game (published in 2000) uses the artwork of Italian comics creator Milo Manara, and if you’re not familiar with the man’s work, you can see some generally not-safe-for-work samples right here. And, as one might expect, the game itself uses some not-safe-for-work artwork, though here I present a few cards that are somewhat less naughty:


The came is comprised of 54 regular cards (9 groups of six, each group with a different colored border), and a “special card” that features an image of Manara’s signature and, of course, a nekkid lady. The point of the game is shuffling and swapping the cards around with the goal of getting three of the same color group in your hand, the specific rules of which I won’t get into here. And I’m not entirely sure what purpose the Manara signature card serves…it seems like if anyone gets it, you just get dealt another card, and you keep the card for an extra point when scores are tallied, I think.

And then, keeping with the overall theme of nakedness on most of the cards, the endgame is as follows:

“Once the points have been added up it must be established how many articles of clothing each opponent must remove. Each player must remove as many articles of clothing as the difference between the points he or she has scored and those scored by the winner.

“It’s up to you to decide how far you want to go to establish when the game ends and if you want to play another game.”

Er, yeah. So much for playing this at the family Christmas gathering, I guess.

It’s a nice looking game, at least…the cards are attractive, with some well-chosen imagery. Not just of naked gals, as I said, but there is the occasional naughty nun, so your mileage may vary. And here is the card back:


And that’s the Manara Game, which just goes to show me that I can still be surprised by things in the comics industry. Also, I forgot to mention that one of the rules of the game is that when you get your three of a kind, you’re supposed to call out “Manara!” I find this hilarious for no reason I can easily pin down.

“Suddenly, eight years later….”

filed under Categories suddenly... 34 Comments

So I’ve been doing this for the equivalent of two U.S. Presidential terms. …Can I start the lucrative speaking tours yet? Maybe get a library named after me, at least?

I’ve said it before, and I’m going to say it again, but…I am still surprised every day that this goofy website of mine has any readership beyond a handful of pals. So, my most sincere thanks to all of you. Thank you for sticking with me for all this time and putting up with my nonsense and leaving comments and sending emails and generally reminding me that, despite my occasional low points and periods of frustration with the industry, I do love this art form.

Thanks also to my girlfriend Nora, who tolerates this behavior; to pal Dorian, who only barely tolerates me; to my parents, one of whom reads my site and the other uses my Amazon links; to Former Employee Aaron, whom I miss having around; to the other folks at the comic shop, most of whom haven’t made it onto the site yet, but maybe someday; to my fellow bloggers, some of whom are on this pretty well outdated links page…I’ll update it eventually; to The Bureau Chiefs, with whom I’ve done some funny stuff; and of course, to Comics Blogger #1, Neilalien, who may have retired from regular blogging, but still remains a singular inspiration.

Speaking of the Bureau Chiefs, this was the year that our book Write More Good, based on our popular Fake AP Stylebook Twitter feed, was released. AND NOW THE AMAZON LINK:


And we’ve started a new feed, Fake Pew Research, with all the fake stats you need for your daily life. (Here’s one I wrote.)

I also started occasionally using my Tumblr account this year, mostly revisting old posts with new commentary, or reposting amusing things from friends, or putting up brand new non-comics things that I found. (You can also still find me on the Twitter, on my barely-used Facebook, and on Estate 4.1, the worst Tumblr ever.)

Anyway, like I do every year, I indulge myself in a little backwards glance at some of my self-proclaimed notable posts from the last year. Please, look, enjoy, or be appalled:

DECEMBER 2010:

The terrifying 1960s animated Brainiac, why would Superman waste his valuable time doing this, the Bi-Onic and Possibly Slightly Communist Hand, those elitist superhero bastards versus Swamp Thing, the son of the artist of Supergirl panel showed up in the comments, I still think DC’s animated movie/TV logo is a bit odd, in which I apparently redid work already done in some book or ‘nother, I refuse to accept Minnie Mouse as a sexual being.

JANUARY 2011:

The 2011 Predictions round-up part a-one, a-two and a-three, this Star Trek recipes book is hilarious, my Hembeckian Sluggo drawing, can’t spell “Christmas” without “Pantsless Superman” you know, you have no idea how long I worked on this stupid gag, piecing together the story of how Superman totally killed a dude, pretty sure we’re within spitting distance of the end of the sales-boosting death, God I love Adam West Batman.

FEBRUARY 2011:

Swamp Thing chatting with his animal pals, my last button from Former Employee Aaron, this post about ’90s superhero art has the best title I’ve ever written for a post – seriously, I should have just stopped blogging right then, I do not regret the hours spent putting together Adam West Batman Valentine’s Day post, Superman Meets Pac-Man art (and reader Dave bought it after seeing it here!), SUPERBABY BUSTS LOOSE, solicitations for Joe Kubert’s The Redeemer.

MARCH 2011:

I love pausing cartoon DVDs and looking for in-jokes and sight gags, if only there were some way I could tell fellow motorists of my love for Thor, my totally work-safe Playboy post, pretty sure I busted the spine on my Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy comic scanning the images for this birthday post, NINE DAYS OF MAN THING: day one | day two | day three | day four | day five | day six | day seven | day eight | day nine, more freeze-frame fun.

APRIL (AND A LITTLE BIT OF MAY) 2011:

I think some people didn’t get I was joking, my “Lusty Gutsy” post resulted in someone making the best joke in the comments, BLOOM COUNTY UNCUT aside from a production error, my super run-on post about Swamp Thing’s return, that’s some fine editing in that Swamp Thing Secret Files there Lou, pre-Swampy Wrightson plant-monster, The Adventures of Alec Holland, pal Tom Foxmarnick’s bad-ass Swamp Thing & Man-Thing drawing, suckered into buying Swamp Thing variant covers, hey remember when I tried to stop doing Sluggo Saturdays (1 2).

THE REST OF MAY 2011:

I go on and on about Swamp Thing’s return, more Swamp Thing versus the DC Universe, I had this first Satan Saturday planned for like six months, Former Employee Aaron’s wedding and Free Comic Book Day — two great tastes that go great together, attack of Steve Ditko’s cute werewolf, so I really did watch Smallville for ten freakin’ years, alternate art for that first Search for Swamp Thing cover, let me just overanalyze this old Swamp Thing comic, I actually sat on this Robotman post for months.

JUNE 2011:

My first post about DC’s New 52 thing, I’m an old man and don’t “get” this “digital comics” thingamajig, I never ever ever get tired of Grant Morrison and Ken Steacy’s superhero version of John Constantine, probably my single favorite post-Sluggo Saturday gag, I scanned my Swamp Thing t-shirt, I imagine it would be quite terrifying to be Superboy’s friend, I worked hard on getting a good Barry White/Swamp Thing gag for the title, shame about that Green Lantern movie, Adam West Batman = classic literature, there’s nothing quite like Frank Robbins Superboy.

JULY 2011:

I talk about passage of time between certain comics industry events like it has any meaning, Elasti-Girl and Multi-Woman pound the tar out of each other — go ahead and look — I’ll wait, Klarion: PIMP, dirty filthy dirty comics, I’d probably wear one of these around the store if I had one in my possession, we’re onto your secret identities Supes and Bats, this What If Conan panel makes me laugh every time, “Black Savage” is actually that character’s name, more superheroes from that Foom contest, CONAN VERSUS MAMMOTH, Swamp Thing drawings by Former Employee Aaron and Daniel, that Swamp Thing mini was pretty pointless, Former Employee Timmy brings me Swamp Thing action figure tribute, this is the worst parade-dragon ever.

AUGUST 2011:

What the hell was wrong with kids in the ’60s, I’m glad I was able to find what that gesture was actually called so I didn’t have to say Sinestro was giving people the finger, I can’t get enough Vaughn Bodé, the best thing about posting about comics an’ stuff is when someone involved in it shows up in the comments, which New 52 titles I’m getting (subtract Justice League International and Mister Terrific, add Aquaman, Omac and Batgirl), and here are the Marvels I’m reading, I suggest that caption in a Swamp Thing comic was added after the fact, and Rick Veitch says I’m right, THE THING VERSUS VEGETABLES, Violet is a hideous human being, I love it when members of the actual creative team write to tell me about Swamp Thing tie-ins, I am Swamp Thing’s best friend and it’s OFFICIAL you bastards.

SEPTEMBER 2011:

A little more new 52 sales discussion, and some more, I asked what new DC title you were looking forward to and you answered, here’s why Superman’s new costume is terrible, I totally cave on the Sluggo front and then explain why, Swamp Thing and Abby cosplay, wow Hela — you’re hot, a picture of me being tired and old, I answer some complete stranger’s Swamp Thing question, I have a soft spot for Firestorm, these Swamp Thing shirts should be showing up relatively soon.

OCTOBER 2011:

SUPERMAN VERSUS PUPPY, I deface one of Former Employee Aaron’s drawings, that balloon is still sitting here on my desk, Former Employee Aaron became Former Employee Aaron on this very day, Ambush Bug: Murderer, Curt Swan is awesome, THUNDERBOLTS VERSUS THE UNFORTUNATE TYPO, the only piece of Wolverine merchandising that ever need exist, Batman movie ad slicks, the older I get the more I relate to Lanny Lummox and less to the Raccoon Kids, purchasing comic collections is not for wimps, I still can’t believe this happened, sometimes I don’t mind when people have written in my old comics.

NOVEMBER 2011:

Camels are indeed humpy, please enjoy the Six Million Dollar Man’s body parts, remember when Aquaman’s hook hand was a thing, Christopher Reeve is awesome, everybody loves Chewbacca (except…the Empire), I’m afraid to check if there’s a Green Lantern Confessions Tumblr yet, I really should scan more from this old Monster Manual, frankly I think my capybara drawing is fairly realistic, AMBUSH BUG AND SUPER-TURTLE VERSUS FRED HEMBECK, an awesome Jim Aparo splash and one of the writers of that comic provides a bit of commentary, I’ll take any excuse to post about Composite Superman.

DECEMBER 2011:

Okay, seems kind of silly to separate December out at this point, but let’s look at that great Superboy drawing again, why don’t we? And I didn’t note these in any of the above links, but every month had an End of Civilization, which surprisingly hasn’t ended yet, so go back and take a look at a few of those, if you are so inclined.

• • •

For reading all that, you get my earliest extant superhero drawing, which I drew circa 1974. Apparently that’s Super-Rabbit busting out of a house window, there:


Thanks for reading, everyone, and I’ll see you tomorrow.

If I use any more “quotation marks,” I’m going to turn into a “Jack Kirby” script.

filed under Categories pal plugging, retailing 1 Comment

 

  • There’s really nothing quite like standing there and feeling the covers to multiple copies of R. Crumb’s Big Ass Comics #1, trying to determine the relative glossiness of the cover stock (which indicates what printing the book is, according to the Underground Price Guide), and then noticing someone is watching you do this with a “what the hell are you doing?” look in his eye. “Just can’t get enough of these sexy, sexy vulture women,” sez I.

  • Thanks to DC sticking to their strict new scheduling for the New 52 books, last week was a “skip week,” meaning no New 52 books on the stands. Seeing as how it’s been a while since we’ve had a real skip week, giving the general publishing strategy of “get it out there as soon as it’s ready” that everyone seemed to be following, I’ve had to explain the concept of “skip weeks” several times over the last few days. Not just to folks coming in for the new Action Comics, but to some of the newer employees as well. …At least there was no “fifth week event” to fill the shelves this time around, and some of my customers were grateful for the break.

  • Speaking of things that came out last week, the Gumby Arthur Adams Specials trade paperback apparently had some behind-the-scenes shenanigans going on, as it was released with big ol’ color stickers over the logos, replacing them with a logo that reads “Gumby Spring Specials.” (And, as Greg notes, neither of the comics reprinted inside were “Spring Specials,” so…huh?) One sticker on the front cover, another sticker on the back cover, one on the copyright page inside, and “Arthur Adams” inked out on the spine. …Hopefully, this will be returnable, since it was going to be a hard sell at $12.99 as it was for this thin digest. The stickers are just going to make it more difficult. Too bad, as it is absolutely wonderful cartooning from Adams, with scripts by Bob Burden and Steve Purcell, which totally deserves being kept in print. With any luck, a future edition will be sticker-free.

  • And this has nothing to do with funnybook retailing, but I wanted to note that pals Dor and Ken have trailer reviews up. Always a good read.

Even that logo is amazing.

filed under Categories found art 5 Comments

I don’t mind having piles of comics we don’t need dumped on us, so long as I find original fan art like this mixed in with them:


There is nothing about this I don’t love.

(This doesn’t mean that I will happily take your long boxes of Youngblood Strikefile on the off-chance there might be one of your drawings of Crypt in there, by the way.)

Progressive Ruin presents…the End of Civilization.

filed under Categories End of Civilization 15 Comments

It’s like Christmas Day without bags full of ripped-up wrapping paper or any actual stuff in your possession…it’s the End of Civilization, where I poke through our distributor’s catalog and point out the best and the brightest of the items offered therein. Or at least the items I can make a smart-ass comment about. Bust out your copies of the December 2011 edition of Diamond Previews and follow along, why don’t you already:

p. 142 – Starcraft Premium Series 2 Collectible Figures:


“Moooom! This jacket’s way too big for me!”

“Oh, don’t worry, son…you’ll grow into it.”

p. 207 – Pigs #6:


…The same Previews that let this through last month:

p. 215 – Marvel Select Avengers Movie Hawkeye and Hulk Action Figures:


Thank goodness they used a whole page to show us the figures weren’t ready to be shown. Well, it’s just one page out of the solicitations…no big deal.

p. 228 – Richie Rich Valentine’s Day Special 2012 One-Shot:


The inherent tragedy of Richie Rich: never knowing if he is truly loved for who he is, or simply loved for his money. EVERY VALENTINE’S DAY: wallowing in rampant consumerism and shallow meaningless relationships, showering others in gifts while ignoring the nagging doubts, and the gaping emptiness, in his heart.

p. 337 – Batman Bat Signal Kit:


If you light up this two-inch high Bat Signal replica, one of the Borrowers turns up in his homemade Batman outfit, who then fights the Indian in the Cupboard, who is inexplicably dressed as the Penguin. …Hey, I don’t make it up, I just report it.

p. 337 – DC Superhero Figurine Collection Magazine Special – Swamp Thing:


Oh, and it has to be one of the larger statuettes, making this one of the $38 specials, and not the regular $14 mag. You bastards.

p. 348 – Angry Birds Bad Piggies’ Egg Recipes HC:


Recipes presumably created by Piggies experimenting upon the eggs they eggnapped from the Angry Birds, which is the reason the Birds are so Angry in the first place. …Surely this is a Geneva Convention violation of some sort.

p. 358 – Superhero X-Ray T-shirts:


They should do a Plastic Man version of one of these shirts, just so we could see what the hell is going on in there. Or maybe Bouncing Boy.

p. 363 – Green Lantern “Classic Word” Snap Back Cap:


If only this were actually how the logo was mounted on the hat. And it could spin around like a propeller. With a whistling noise, like this: “WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE”

p. 366 – Marvel Select Avengers Movie Hawkeye and Hulk Action Figures:


Oh, say…a second full page devoted to not showing you the figures which apparently weren’t ready at press time. But hey, what’s two catalog pages between friends, right?

p. 373 – Hope Diamond Barbie Doll:


Sadly, the Hope Diamond Curse struck again, as Hope Diamond Barbie was attacked and killed by a pack of wild dogs while visiting Moscow.

p. 373 – Hot Wheels Video Racer Micro Camera Car:

“Hot Wheels Video Racer cars are the first 1:64 track-compatible cars with a fully functional camera encased in the body! Using the clips and straps provided, it can be also attached to bikes, helmets, skateboards – nearly anything that moves! […] Video can be easily edited…and shared to show off your thrilling race footage with friends and family!”

“And now…presenting our remake of Fantastic Voyage, starring our Great Dane, Barkimus!”

p. 388 – Star Wars Kenner Walrus Man 12-Inch Action Figure:


This is unholy.

p. 394 – Star Wars General Veers Mini-Bust:


This is someone’s favorite Star Wars character. …That person’s time has come.

p. 406 – Cars 2 Mater & Speed McQueen Be@rbrick 2-Pack:


You wouldn’t think seeing the Cars characters in human form would be as upsetting as it is, but it is. Oh Lordy.

p. 406 – Star Trek Khan Noonien Singh Maxi Bust:


You’re darned tootin’ this is a Maxi Bust. Ricardo Montalban’s chestiest performance, immortalized in this most manly of statues.

Marvel Previews p. 75 – Marvel Select Avengers Movie Hawkeye and Hulk Action Figures:


What is the mystery of…”Hawkeye” and “the Hulk?” What secrets are they hiding? Are they friends…or foes? Surely this third full page ad will whet your appetite for these two exciting new characters!
 
 
 

Special thanks to Evil Bully for tracking down that Boys scan.

Decided I needed to beef up the “Gelatinous Cube” category a bit.

filed under Categories gelatinous cube 4 Comments

Just get your hands on card #577 from the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons 2nd Edition 1991 Trading Cards Set:


…and paste it into that big ol’ blank space next to the Gelatinous Cube entry in your first edition Monster Manual (provided you haven’t already supplied an illustration of your own), and you’re all set.

Yes, yes, I know that means crossing the 1st Edition/2nd Edition AD&D streams. Don’t you rules-lawyer me.

Yes, it’s another links post…sorry, been busy.

filed under Categories sir-links-a-lot 5 Comments

 

From the backroom of misfit toys.

filed under Categories misfit toys, wolverine 3 Comments

Well, it’s not really a “toy” as the term is generally used, and it’s not an item that’s been sitting around in our backroom for years and years (it’s from a box of another store’s stock dumped at our shop), so I’m abusing the title a bit, I guess. But it’s certainly a misfit item:


I don’t know if anyone’s still doing the mini CD-ROM “multimedia collector cards” thing, but I seem to recall a number of releases along these lines about ten years ago. (My particular favorites were the randomly-packed “chase card” die-cut CD-ROMs that came with this Star Trek set.)

Anyway, as it says there, the CD (dated 2002) contains screen savers and desktop pics and “hotlinks to websites” that are probably defunct (aside from Marvel.com, if it’s there), and “Motion Comics,” which, sight unseen, I can safely guess are likely terrible.

And it’s in the 3-inch format, so you gotta tray-load this sucker:


…which means, even if I wanted to open the package and check it out (which I’m not, since I’m throwing this bad boy on the eBay) I can’t put this in the front-loading slot drive on my Mac. I suppose I could bust out the old 3-inch CD adapter plastic ring (originally bought back in — ’87? — to play the original They Might be Giants “Don’t Let’s Start” 3-inch C-Dingle on my first CD player) but I wouldn’t want to run the risk of the disc coming loose from the adapter and spending the rest of the day trying to fish it out and boy am I on a tangent.

This is the first of a planned six, it seems:


“Collect all VI.” Oh you guys. Anyway, a brief Googling only turns up this same disc, so maybe that’s all that came out? I’m sure if someone out there did buy all VI, they’ll let me know.

Questions I am asked at the store.

filed under Categories retailing 7 Comments

So I had a phone call from one of regular customers, who asked “which side of Composite Superman is the Superman side?” I wasn’t able to get on the computer and check at the time (and I didn’t ask why he didn’t Google it up), but, well, I had to think about it for just a second. We all know half of Composite Superman looks like Superman, and the other half looks like Batman…but after not having read a Composite Superman story in a while, and not having looked at a Composite Superman action figure lately either, I wasn’t able to answer the gentleman with 100% confidence.

I did give him a reasonably-certain “his right side” and, when I got a chance to hop onto the internettings, I discovered I was correct:


…And the return appearances of the Composite Superman in the ’60s and ’80s, despite being a different Composite Superman at least one of those times, retained the same arrangement:


However, my goo-goo-Googling-about revealed images of a Compy Supey (as his pals call him) with the sides reversed, and that appears to be from Superman/Batman Annual #3:


…which of course resulted in that one episode of Star Trek where Kirk landed on a planet of Composite Supermen, and just could not figure out why some of the Composite Supermen hated each other so much.

Anyway, I’m glad I was able to come through with the more-or-less correct answer for that customer.

Here’s a question another customer asked:

“How come there aren’t any Miracleman trades out?”

My response: “rights issues.” …For this particular query, sometimes that’s a better response than getting into all this hoohar.

 

images from The Grand Comics Database