Yet another post about new DC titles.

So I wasn’t sure who drew that Justice League Dark cover I posted yesterday…I thought it might have been the artist for the series, but it’s been pointed out to me that it’s Ryan Sook. So there you go.

And DC announced more titles yesterday, apparently with the feeling that this new version of Titans is a good idea:


Why they didn’t call it Extreme Young Justice, I can’t imagine, since it looks like a natural extension of DC’s most ’90s of their 1990s output. (Pal Andrew has lots more to say about this particular impending release.)

On the other hand, the new Hawk and Dove series presented at that same DC blog link up there doesn’t look too bad. …You know, by comparison. That took some doing, considering. However, I didn’t notice the little beaks on their masks at first, and after my pal Dana pointed them out to me, now I can’t stop looking at them. (EDIT: Apparently Hawk and Dove originally had mask-beaks, I’m told? And I never noticed them? …This is terrible.)

I may have to reconsider my recent abandonment (after nearly 30 years!) of the Legion of Super-Heroes franchise, because a new Legion series drawn by Pete Woods sounds pretty good to me. (Thought I’d better say something nice, Just so I don’t come across entirely as a big grumpy poopypants.)

“Aye, ’tis an ill omen, Hellblazer.”

So, when I first read DC Comics’ announcement of Justice League Dark, a series teaming up John Constantine, Madame Xanadu, Deadman, and others to fight supernatural-type thingies:


…the first thing that crossed my mind was, of course, my most fervent hope that Constantine will be wearing the costume he had in Doom Patrol #53 (March 1992), the Jack Kirby parody/tribute issue:


If you claim not to want this as well, I shall call you a dirty, dirty liar.

…Also, apparently the new Swamp Thing series is official, written by Scott Snyder and drawn by Yannick Paquette. Well, that sounds like it might be good. I’ve not read anything by Snyder, but I know his American Vampire series is well-regarded, as is his recent run on Detective, and I’ve enjoyed Paquette’s work in the past. So…um, yeah, I’ll pick this up in three months’ time. But was there ever any real danger of me not picking up a Swamp Thing comic?

I wonder what it would take for me not to buy a Swamp Thing series. …Don’t say “if it were written and drawn by Rob Liefeld” because I’d buy the hell out of that.

images from (presumably) Justice League Dark #1, cover by (also presumably) Mikel Janin, and Doom Patrol #53 (March 1992) by Grant Morrison and Ken Steacy

I will happily link to images of that Burt Reynolds centerfold for pretty much any reason.

So something caught my eye in that issue of Popeye #148 recently pulled an image or two from recently. On the inside front cover was an ad for (mostly) celebrity posters, each with a tiny thumbnail image, which also included this fine example of pseudo-Star Wars ephemera:


Sadly, I could find no good larger-sized image of the actual poster, as opposed to this tiny pic from the ad, but did find this year-old Tumblr post featuring a similarly-sized scan, as well as pics of the Adam Rich poster and the full ad in question.

I couldn’t track down any more info about this poster, which shouldn’t be too surprising, but even just this tiny image, blown up as it is, tantalizes with the ’70s cheesy Star Wars knockoff goodness it surely contains.

Alternately, this ad also featured this Bullwinkle poster, a parody of the famous (and possibly NSFW) Burt Reynolds Cosmopolitan centerfold:


This, I could find better images for, at an auction site, which gives a lot of two posters and an iron-on transfer of this image a $400 to $700 price range or starting bid or some darn thing. That listing also notes a possible legal action that removed the name “Burt Reynolds” from the original version of that image, which I can’t find verification for, but there’s no denying “Burt Reynolds” is no longer on that poster.

So anyway, there’s a little something that isn’t half-panicked DC Comics news. Please enjoy this little oasis of goofiness.

Hey, I haven’t mentioned Swamp Thing here for a while.

So sources tell me (and by “sources” I mean “Google alerts”) that as part of this coming DC Comics relaunch hoohar, we may be getting a new Swamp Thing series. Which I suppose makes sense, since DC just put all that effort into bringing the character back into their superhero-universe fold. I’m writing this on Sunday evening, so I’m about half-sure when I wake up in the morning there’ll be plenty of info on the series then, but as of now all I know about it is this swank Yanick Paquette cover:


…which has been popping up on message boards and sites here and there keeping track of all the announcements of new DC titles.

Speaking of Swamp Thing, as I so rarely do, here is an interview with Jonathan Vankin, who, aside from not being my secret penname, is the writer of the Search for Swamp Thing mini-series. Now, I haven’t been keeping up on every single bit of Swampy news spoken by every DC Comics representative, because I have to get my usual two hours of sleep a day sometime, but there is a clarification or three regarding the exact nature of the relationship between the Vertigo versions of Swamp Thing and John Constantine. Judging by the visual cues, at least with Constantine as I mentioned at the end of this post, it’s no surprise, but it’s nice to see someone confirm it.

In other Swamp Thing news, apparently he’s going to pop up in the DC Universe Online game as part of a special player event, where he is in battle with Batman villain Poison Ivy. I guess players’ hero characters will be fighting alongside Swamp Thing, while villain players will be on Ivy’s side. Or something like that. I don’t get these crazy “video games” all you kids are into.

And before you (yes, you, you know who you are) ask, I still don’t know what the variant covers look like for Search for Swamp Thing #2 and #3. Soon as I know, they’ll be up here, I promise!

I’m really not on top of this whole “digital comics” thing.

Just to clarify…I don’t really think we won’t get an Action Comics #1000 when the time comes. That’s still about eight or so years off, and I’m sure between the restart at #1 and then, DC will revert to the original numbering on at least some books, following Marvel’s strategy of riding out that sales boost from a new first issue, and replacing it with another sales boost by switching back the numbering just before a round-numbered anniversary issue. So honestly, that’s not a real criticism…I was just being facetious.

And speaking of the relaunches…pal Dorian pointed out to me that this line-wide reversion to #1s is more about creating a promotional push for the digital-release plans than about making any kind of sales improvement in the direct market. And…yeah, I hadn’t really been thinking about it from the digital side, but of course that makes sense. Pretty much no matter what, the direct market isn’t going to grow, or at least grow quickly enough to keep the publishers happy (brief spurts of media-driven sales aside). The primary print sales strategy of late is extracting more money from the same folks…no one thinks a half-dozen Avengers or Green Lantern titles are bringing in new readers. It’s just getting the same ol’ Avengers or Green Lantern fans to dig a little deeper (or, more likely, drop another marginal book) to afford yet another negligible variation on a title they’re already reading.

In contrast, the digital initiative could potentially reach a much larger audience that would never set foot in a comic shop, and the additional incentive of “hey, get in on the ground floor” with the first issues may help. Whether this leads to more readers seeking out print editions in shops, or just subsidizes the print editions to keep prices down for just a little longer, or whether anyone will bite at all, or whether it just saves the scans_daily folks a step, I’m not sure. We’ll see what happens, of course.

The pricing for digital releases has been announced, and just from my limited observation of the response, people don’t care for the price levels being offered. (Basically, same price as print edition, dropping a dollar after a month.) Of course, the general reaction to pricing for any online entertainment that’s anything other than “free” tends to be abject horror*, and I suspect at even the frequently-suggested 99-cent price point there wouldn’t still be some headshakers moaning “too much, too much,” but…well, not sure what people were expecting. If DC undercut the comic shops, retailers would’ve raised holy hell, I’m sure, and they can’t afford to alienate those folks just yet. Especially if this whole digital thing falls flat. But…yeah, it could be over before it begins if people reject the pricing.

Boy, some insight, huh? “IT’LL WORK UNLESS IT DOESN’T.” Man, I have no idea what’s going to happen. My gut feeling is that print sales will bump up briefly, then fall back to normal, with a lot of culling of the weaker titles right quick, while digital sales will be okay, but not outstanding, with pricing being cited as the primary obstacle. Maybe a discounted digital subscription will be offered as response, assuming it can get by under retailers’ radar. Basically, I see business being as usual, with a few months of annoyance all around mixed in there while everything shakes out.

Anyway, you probably have seen DC’s announcement of some of the new titles and creative teams, and…well, surely this will be the Aquaman series that will catch on! And as a Firestorm fan, I’m looking forward to another series with the character, especially one written by Gail Simone.

There’s a new Hawkman series, too, and this is one of those cases where a full-on from-scratch reboot would probably be doing the character a favor. Hawkman doesn’t need the last couple of decades’ worth of mishmashed continuity issues weighing him down…he just needs to be awesome. “Flying dude dressed as hawk fights crime with a mace” – that’s all you need, man.

However, if you want a complete list of all the titles from The New DC, I believe Bully the Little Stuffed Bull might have that for you. #27 is the best. The. Best.
 
 
 
 

* I’m exaggerating slightly for humorous effect. Please do not “um, actually” me, or I will have you…dealt with. Remember, I’m friends with a stuffed bull.

Progressive Ruin presents…the brand new End of Civilization!

Hey gang! Welcome to the very first installment of the End of Civilization, a brand new feature here at Progressive Ruin! I’m your host, 26-year-old Spike Merling, inviting you to pop up the collars on your new costumes, flip open your June 2011 edition of Diamond Previews, and follow along!

p. 61-136 – DC Comics:

Huh, that’s strange…it seems like nearly every comic this month has “finale” or “final battle” or “shocking conclusion” or something similar in its solicitation:


That’s some coincidence. It’s almost like they’re planning some fresh starts in the following month.

p. 163 – Berkeley Breathed’s Bloom County Calendar 2012:


Suddenly I feel like I’m back in high school again. Who’d have thought we’d ever see another Bloom County calendar?

Looks like they fixed this problem, too:

p. 169 – The Infinite #1 Deluxe Edition:


Well, it’s a little toned-down from Liefeld’s most famous use of this pose, but, um…where did their butts go

p. 223 – I Got My Ass to Mars T-Shirt:


I almost admire the decision to put out a Total Recall t-shirt almost 21 years after the fact (remake notwithstanding). But aside from that…this character in particular at best shares an ass, right?

p. 228 – Archie & Friends #157:


Speaking of old things being new again, that’s some continuing commitment to the original “Man from R.I.V.E.R.D.A.L.E.” gimmick of parodying the 1960s trend of elaborately-acronymed organizations in spy movies.

p. 290 – Gumby’s Arthur Adams Specials TP:


And speaking of yet more old things: “for the first time in 25 years the Eisner Award-winning Gumby Specials are available!”

And by “old things,” I mean me, and how I’m feeling right now after reading that.

p. 340 – Classic Marvel Figurine Collection Magazine #157 – Moondragon:


Someone somewhere is shrugging, saying “eh, close enough” and making room on his Persis Khambatta tribute shelf.

p. 344 – Undying Monsters Magazine #3:


So Wednesday at the shop we received a copy of Freaky Monsters, and here we have Undying Monsters. I wonder if I can get away with Infamous Monsters, or would the Famous Monsters people get on my case? (Or has it already been done? I bet it has.)

p. 345 – Saved by The Bell Guide to Life SC:


“…And most importantly, don’t play a stripper in a Paul Verhoeven movie.”

p. 346 – The World of Smurfs HC:


Probably not featured in the book: this.

p. 347 – The Raven Kit:


Comes with a mini raven statuette that contains a “Nevermore!” soundchip. Probably works at the push of a button, but really should just do it randomly. While it’s sitting on top of your chamber door. Looking at you.

p. 349 – Star Wars: How to Speak Wookiee HC:


It’s a sound book, with suggestions on what to say and how to say it in everyday dealing with Wookiees. Ladies, gentlemen, droids…this is the greatest book ever made.

p. 349 – Star Wars The Essential Guide to Warfare SC:


“Stormtroopers: always aim high or off to the side, to anticipate any sudden evasive movements. Aiming directly at the target is a fool’s game.”

p. 362 – Married with Children “No Ma’am” White T-Shirt:


For a second there I thought this was a piece of Dilbert merchandise. My mistake.

p. 364 – Green Lantern Movie Tomar-Re and Kilowog Latex Hands:


These are things that you will be able to find in stores (or online) and buy. Truly this is an age of wonders.

p. 366 – Thor Movie: Loki Deluxe Costume:


I offered Employee Aaron one American dollar if he would wear this costume at work. Or, you know, at least that awesome helmet. Hey, it only costs 65 bucks, and I’m kicking in a buck. The least he could do is spring for the rest.

p. 369 – Zombie Hunter Military Style Green T-Shirt:


You know the guy wearing this shirt is the first one going down when the zombie apocalypse begins.

p. 376 – Bruce Lee Series 1 5-inch Action Figures:


This is what I picture the red blood cells in Bruce Lee’s veins must have looked like.

p. 379 – DC Universe Mez-Itz Series 2 6-Inch Action Figures:


Clearly Darkseid did not have likeness approval rights on this product.

p. 384 – Marvel Universe Super Hero Team Action Figure Packs:


H.E.R.B.I.E. action figure.


H.E.R.B.I.E. action figure.


H.E.R.B.I.E. ACTION FIGURE.

p. 385 – Alien Facehugger Plush:


It doesn’t say in the solicitation, but surely this is life-size. SURELY IT MUST BE. Who wouldn’t put one of these on his or her face immediately? …Well, maybe not John Hurt.

p. 386 – Barbie Famous Friends Frank Sinatra Doll:


Super Teen Skipper Frank Sinatra Jr. Doll sold separately.

p. 387 – Peanuts 2011 Christmas Deluxe Poseable Figures:


First glance through the catalog, I irrationally thought Lucy was holding some kind of elaborate crossbow there. “I’m going to kick the football for sure, Lucy!” “Oh, I don’t think so, Charlie Brown.” THWIPP. THUNK.

p. 393 – Star Wars Footeez Plushes:


“AAAH WHO PUT TOMATOES ON MY EYES”


“Man, I hate having to shave.”


“CHEST…STRAPS…TOO TIGHT”


Minimalist Artoo is minimalist.


“Stormtroopers are tasty!”


“Call me ‘Stewie’ why do you?”

p. 398 – Lady Death Fine Art Bronze Statue:


$2,900 a pop. Limited to only 30 pieces, so tough luck if you were planning to use these as table centerpieces at any large formal gatherings.

p. 399 – The Walking Dead Nate Torso Statuette:


Man, a dude wearing a Walking Dead t-shirt…becoming a zombie? What are the chances of that happening?

p. 407 – Star Wars 2-1B Surgical Droid Mini-Bust:


Somewhere the world’s biggest 2-1B fan is clearing room on his tribute shelf. …Probably not the same guy as the Persis Khambatta fan I mentioned above, but you never know.

p. 412 – Kotobukiya Original Dinosaur Chopsticks:


So I can’t decide…is it more disturbing to eat your food with an animal’s tail…

p. 412 – Animal Chopsticks:


…or an animal’s nose?

p. 413 – To-Heart 2 Another Days Silfa-Summer Memories Ani-Statue:


Hmmm…just what could the primary selling points of this statue be?

p. 425 – Alien Blood Energy Drink:

“Have you ever experience a loss of memory or ‘missing time’? Do you have reoccuring [sic] dreams of extraterrestrial worlds or landscapes? Have you discovered strange bumps, bruises, or rectal pain? Have you ever experienced a loss of energy? If so, there is a good chance you have been abducted by aliens! Never fear – Harcos Labs can help with the loss of energy.”

You know, that’s some confidence in the tastiness of your novelty drink to include the words “rectal pain” in your sales pitch.

p. 429 – Charlie Sheen Talking Wacky Wobbler:


I can’t help but think some of the words in this item’s name may be redundant.

p. 431 – Gumby 16-Ounce Pub Glass:


Just in case your drinking experience required ADDITIONAL TERROR.

p. 444 – Ventura Board Game:


Imagine my disappointment that this game wasn’t about Ventura, CA, the city in which our store is based. “Whoops, you’ve landed on Ralph’s Comic Corner. Fork over all your cash while Mike laughs maniacally.”

I’m not going to be terribly happy if this means I won’t see an Action Comics #1000 in my lifetime.

So I’m guessing most of you have heard by now about DC Comics’ plan to restart all their superhero series from #1, along with some attendant retoolings and revampings (and not a line-wide rebooting of every single character from scratch, as had been assumed). Basically, it looks like they’re slapping a new coat of paint on everything, giving some characters new costumes, and giving folks new jumping-on points. And there’s the same-day digital releases that will be available for all these series as well, which…well, as a funnybook retailer, I’m not entirely sure how I feel about that, but that’s a whole ‘nother issue I’ll get into at some later date.

But first…fifty-two new number ones in a five-week period, during the traditionally-slow sales month of September, in this economic climate where the cost of a new DC comic would also get you most of a gallon of gasoline…that’s a bit intimidating, when you first look at it. But I suspect most readers will just carry over with the titles they’re already reading as long as they don’t change too drastically. If you’re enjoying Secret Six at number…what, #36, maybe it’ll be at when the reboot hits, then I suspect you’ll still enjoy it when you pick up the new #1, assuming the creative team remains relatively intact. And if the comics are good and you enjoy them, then it shouldn’t matter if it’s issue #1 or #801.

Of course, the problem with creating new jumping-on points is the oft-stated fact (at least by me) that they’re also good jumping-off points, which is a bad idea particularly now with, as I said, the current economic climate. Some people are itching for reasons to drop books, but they hate to quit in middles of stories…give ’em a definite ending, like wrapping up the series in preparation for a relaunch, they may split and never come back.

And then there are the series that just recently started, like Batman: The Dark Knight. At this point, with #3 of this series running behind, they might as well just throw a #1 on that issue and wait ’til the relaunch to put it out. I’m also assuming in-progress mini-series like DC Universe Online Legends aren’t going to restart with #1s in the middle of their runs. Could be wrong. Have no idea.

Speaking of late books, with all the series restarting at #1 at about the same time, it’s going to be that much easier to spot the comics having scheduling problems in a few months. When everyone’s at issue #11 or #12, and, say, Detective (to pick one at random) is at issue #7, that’s gonna stand out.

Of course, the news was only announced yesterday, so it’s a bit early to enter panic mode. Obviously I’m just blathering on here with my immediate reactions to the announcements. However, I am curious as to how the various series and characters will be altered, and am particularly interested in the effect of this initiative on some of DC’s long-running projects, like Grant Morrison’s Batman Inc.. That’s a franchise-wide rejiggering of the Batman concept that seems like it still has a way to go before its eventual resolution and return to the status quo…I’m guessing it’ll be carried over into the relaunched titles, and not cut short, but again, I don’t have the details.

While I’m curious as a fan about what DC is doing, as a retailer I’m a little worried. Not just about the jumping-off point thing I noted already, but also about how I’m going to explain this to the customers who are going to be caught completely by surprise by DC’s plans. I know it sounds strange, since all of you reading this are plugged into the Web Matrix-style via interface ports at the bases of your skulls, but I have regular customers for whom their exposure to comics news comes from walking into the store and looking at the rack to see what’s new. I can hear them already: “Hey, why is Superman at issue #1 again? And Batman? …And, hey, Legion of Super-Heroes? Again? What’s going on?” Which is fine…that’s part of my job, to explain what new dumb thing a comic publisher has done to confuse and frighten its readership this week.

But as a pal of mine noted to me in email, if this particular publishing initiative falls flat on its face, where does DC go from there? This is an awfully drastic and wide-ranging strategy that won’t be easy to reverse without some consequences. And not just of the “fans and Marvel Comics laughing at DC’s failure” kind, but having highers-up at Warner Brothers looking at the crash-and-burn and thinking “that didn’t work, so why are we bothering with these pamphlet-thingies? Let’s just do cartoons and movies with these characters, and make some real money on them.”

Hopefully, this all doesn’t mean that we’re one step closer to the answer to “comic books? They still make those?” being “no.” Yeah, yeah, I know people have been predicting the end of comics (at least, the “mainstream” Big Two comics) for years, but this feels more like an end-of-their-rope/nothing-left-to-lose move than normal.

Most importantly: if this screws up Swamp Thing’s return to comics, I’m going to be pissed. Unless all the series are being revamped to include Swamp Thing, which I’d be okay with. Swamp Thing and the Outsiders, Batman and Robin and Swamp Thing, Swamp Thing Corps…you know, like that. Gotta keep my sense of perspective.

Peppermint Patty, Future RIAA Board Member.

From the recent Fantagraphics release The Complete Peanuts: 1979-1980:


Yes, I know that this sort of thing has been a concern for a very long time, but there was still that very brief moment of “the past, and the future…COLLIDING” reading this, given the current nearly-constant media presence regarding the dangers of home taping. Or whatever it is you kids do nowadays, what with your cassette players and your patch cords and your kinescopes.

Charles Schulz, topical humorist across the decades! (Someday, Daniel Boone-style coonskin caps will come back into style, and all the Peanuts strips about those will become relevant again…just you watch!)

Related: the Schulz Museum has an exhibit last year focusing on the various pop culture references found in the strip. No online version of the exhibit appears to exist (though maybe I’m just not finding it), but I’ve briefly discussed before the odd feeling of encountering real-world pop culture mentions in the strip.