A quick movie comic aside.

So please feel free to keep letting me know what your favorite movie-inspired comics are…you’re reminding me of a couple I’d forgotten about, and I’ll probably follow up on that post soon.

Anyway, it does remind me of one of my favorite movie-to-comic translation glitches, from DC Comics’ Star Trek: Generations.

In the film, there’s a scene where the Enterprise is on the verge of crash-landing on a nearby planet. The camera focuses on Data, newly in possession of an “emotion chip,” who exclaims “oh, shit!” Here’s how that exact moment appears in the movie:


It’s funny because 1) it’s an entirely unexpected use of a vulgarity, in a franchise not known for them; 2) it’s from the last character you’d expect; and 3) it’s an entirely understandable reaction, a reaction that normal people like you or I would have should we be in the exact same situation (saucer section of the ship about to crash due to an attack by the Klingons, captain on the planet surface fighting Malcolm McDowell, recently installed emotion ship not working properly…you know, situations like that).

Here’s how that same scene plays out in the comic book adaptation:


“Oh, shit” is still there, but entirely stripped of the context that makes it amusing. Who said “oh, shit?” Who knows? You can’t tell from this panel.

Oh, and by the way…


…it’s Comics Code approved.
 
 
(Updated 9/2017)

In which Mike tries to draw you folks into his particular obsessions again.

A random thought from work: Dark Horse has hitched its wagon to its share of chickens re: licensed movie tie-ins. Lost in Space, the Tim Burton version of Planet of the Apes, Aeon Flux…with POTA especially it looked like Dark Horse was trying to create an ongoing funnybook franchise, which kinda petered out. That’s a long way from the salad days of Aliens, Predator, and Terminator (and, to a lesser extent, Robocop).

Part of the problem, of course, is with the films themselves readily available on DVD, there’s little incentive to read the adaptations and film-inspired tie-ins to “recapture the excitement of the movie”…not like the heyday of comic book movie adaptations decades ago, when you saw the movie once in the theatre, and that was pretty much it unless it eventually turned up on television or in rerelease.

Plus, it doesn’t help that the films themselves barely inspire any desire to see more. Did anyone seeing the largely-unnecessary Tim Burton “reimagining” of Planet of the Apes really want to read more about it? Obviously somebody must have, since they did a couple minis, but not enough to produce any more than that. (And I just want to note here that leaving the “surprise ending” out of the adaptation of the film was a really, really bad idea…I’m sure it was the studio’s decision to keep the ending secret, but really, so what? They kept it secret for, what, an extra week? Or two? And the Drudge Report ended up totally spoiling it right away, as I recall. Anyway, without the ending, the adaptation now just looks stupid. Well, more stupid. Feh.)

Star Wars, of course, is the notable exception, and the comics and trades inspired by this movie series are still selling quite well. Dark Horse even managed to get the adaptations of Episodes I, II, and III to move, primarily by releasing them prior to the films’ debuts. However, to its credit, I regularly sell the trade paperback collections of the film adaptations, mostly to children.

I also still sell lots of the Aliens and Predator comics as back issues…even the three Batman Vs. Predator series continue to move. I’m assuming that Dark Horse still has the rights to these two properties, though, if I’m remembering correctly, some behind-the-scenes shenanigans has put the kibosh on those comics for the time being. If so, that’s a shame…those appeal to younger readers as well (I do warn parents about content, but generally, and unusually, if they’re letting their kids watch the films, they don’t object too much to the comics).

Of the Big Two companies, Marvel lately just publishes adaptations of films based on their characters, while flooding related titles with the villains that are featured in said films. (If I never see Doctor Octopus again, it’ll be too soon.) DC also recently has stuck to adapting films based on their books, though they released a handsome-looking adaptation of Sleepy Hollow a few years back. (And remember the earlier adaptation of Alien Nation and, despite the Gene Colan art, the ghastly Little Shop of Horrors? Comic book presentations of musical films are a really, really bad idea.) Most of those sold okay, not great, and when those prequels to Superman Returns arrive, I’ll be interested to see how well those sell.

So, once again, I throw the question to you folks…what comic book adaptations (or spin-off series, or prequels) of films have you really enjoyed? Some of my favorites include the Heavy Metal graphic novel version of Alien drawn by Walt Simonson (with its notoriously fragile binding), the infamous adaptation of Steven Spielberg’s 1941 by Steve Bissette and Rick Veitch, and the Time Bandits comic (that I’ve mentioned before).

What say you, internet pals?

Normal service has resumed.

Just for posterity’s sake, here’s a screenshot of this site from yesterday’s April Fool’s shenanigans:


Since I actually had a couple people ask what was up with that, I’ll note here that it was a takeoff on Fanboy Rampage. Yes, I know most of you folks already knew that, but some didn’t. (Thanks to Graeme, under an assumed name, giving it that extra touch.)

And, in case you missed it, you really need to visit the Swamp Thing Blog. I had no idea that my life was missing Swamp Thing/Abby/Blue Devil/Black Orchid/Detective Chimp golfing fan fiction until I read it for myself.

I’m a little short on time this morning, so let me at least give you a couple links full o’good reading that I totally stole from Mark Evanier: an online Treasure Chest collection, and, even better, all the “This Godless Communism” stories in sequence. Fantastic. As J. Edgar Hoover himself says in the introduction:

“The most effective way for you to fight communism is to learn all you can about it.”

You don’t want those Commies to win, do you? Then get readin’.

Progressive Rampage #3!

“Can Superman break adamantium?”

“Well can he? And I mean any incarnation of him pre-crisis, post, Kingdom Come, Prime, 1 million etc. In the Heroes of the Holocaust crossover special in 1981 Doctor Doom created a robot out an alloy almost as powerful as adamantium but he quickly tears it apart.”

“Adamentium is the stringest thing on earth, supe is not from earth, he could break it with ease”

“…I must disagree. Superman can do it in the presence of a white star. It’s said that these stars give him the most energy.”

“Superman can’t break adamantium. The periodic table is constant throughout the universe. It’s just as strong on earth as it is anywhere else. If he can’t break it here he can’t do it anywhere.”

“Thor couldn’t break Adamantium. The Hulk couldn’t break Adamantium. They are both relatively stronger than Superman. Superman can’t break Adamantium. Simple applied reasoning.”

“The Hulk and Thor are nowhere near as strong as POST crisis Supes.”

“The Hulk and Thor are both way stronger than Post-Crisis Superman. Lobo kicked Post-Crisis Superman’s ass.”

I usually wouldn’t quote this much of a post, but this next one must be read in its entirety:

“HAHAHA, mend it blend it or melt it! I wish they’d do a cross over and we can see what happens. In the last cross over, supes knocked out Thor! I threw the mag away, didn’t buy it duh! But I was pissed! Then supes picked up Thors hammer like it was chicken sh.t! Darn that sulked, only to be told it was Thors dad that allowed it and I thought ‘what a bunch of crap!’ Where do they come up with these ideas? Gosh, so much favoritism for one character! Man, I’d like to see SUpes against Wolverine just to see how they make Spes kill wolverine. Cos if he can knock the sh.t out of Thor , I’d love to see what he does to Wolverine! Healing power or not! Cos the the more severe the injury, I do believe the longer time it takes to heal! Or can he heal it in an instant? Or what if he gets multiple injuries? Supes burning his ass with those laser eyes and moving faster than lighting? Gosh I’d buy a million copies. But we’ll have to wait.”

“No he cant” — and the poster must have had additional thoughts on the topic, for in the very next post: “and no kids sups cant beat the crap out of thor”

“post ,pre, and prime cou;counldnt break pure adimantium the only thing that can is vibrium anti metal B so unless soupie is mad outta dat i dont think so biatchess”

“This will depend on the absolute hardness of adamantium (diamond is 1500), its thoughness and thermodynamic stability.”

“Like most other super-materials in comic books, adamantium is unbreakable until somebody manages to break it”

Let’s wrap up with what should be the final word on the subject:

“only wolverine himself can truly hurt adamantium for he is the owner”

Well said.

Progressive Rampage #2!

“Didio VS. Quesada : The Final Payback!”

“(Now here’s a REAL “VS.” thread fa yo’ a$$)
With disregard for continuity and money-grubbing mentality at an all-time high…
Who would you say is running their company into the ground harder & faster?”

“A year ago, I would have said Marvel. But that’s changed. There’s now a push to bring back many characters not seen in years, and some (not all) of the stories have been quite good.” […] “Then there’s DC. What can I say? They seem unable to rise above B-grade silliness and constantly revamp and reboot in an endless bid to maintain sales and stay relevant. The dead rise again en masse and totally defeat the purpose many past storylines.”

“I HATE IT WHEN ESTABLISHED CHARACTERS GET REPLACED AS A SHORT TERM MARKETING STUNT. I COULD MAKE A GREAT TEAM BOOK FROM THE HEROES THAT ARE CURRENTLY ON HIATUS: AQUAMAN, HAWKMAN, BLUE BEETLE, ATOM, HAWKEYE, VISION (ORIGINAL), AND FIRESTORM (RONNIE). WE ARE PROBABLY GOING TO LOSE SOMEONE IN THE FLASH FAMILY AS WELL.”

“You are complaining about DC reboots when Marvel has given us 4 Captain America #1s since 1996? [devil] How many X-titles have been reworked, redone, rehashed?”

“You complain about that but how many times have we had a JLA#1?!?! And how many times have the Bat and Superman titles been reworked, redone and rehashed?!?! Pot meet kettle, kettle.. this is pot!”

“At present I would say Marvel are slightly better. I’ve enjoyed IC and all its buildup, but it doesn’t look like anything will actually come out of its conclusion, atleast nothing significant”

“Id say Quesada…just because he’s a total sh-t monger…but marvel is still outselling DC(which is a lode of bull)…people are idiots, when it comes to DC now people seem to be just whinney little b-tches…god get over it.”

“It’s like you can smell the desperation in DC’s books. The desperation that comes from knowing you’re big crossover event still didn’t put you over the top, sales-wise. I hope all the death, destruction and general carnage was worth it, DC.”

“Nor Didio or Quesada are driving each other’s company to the ground . Quite the contrary actually, for better or worse the two of them have been keeping both companies neck and neck on the top spots.”

“Let’s see,Im picking up about twenty titles from DC and only one from Marvel(X-Factor)andonly because Peter David is writing it and doing a great job at it.
So in my book Mr.Didio’s DC outdoes Marvel hands down!”

“I refuse to believe that there are 20 truly good titles at DC, Marvel or anywhere else at present. Methinks you are simply a completist.”

Progressive Rampage #1!

The Swamp Thing weblog.

I swear to God it’s not me. And yes, it’s done entirely in character, from Swampy’s perspective. God bless this person:

“The Shadowpact and I fought an extremely violent battle with Dark Hellchid today. We were in Bucharest, Romania–and the conflict took place under the foreboding omen of a solar eclipse. [the sign of the Shadowpact’s nemesis, Eclipso] The menacing creature who was once my beloved young protoge’ Suzy, the Black Orchid was now the demon-possessed fiendish archvillain known to us as Dark Hellchid.”

“Abby and I confronted King Toad today. We regarded the low, pathetically vile creature together with our quiet hatred. He shouted at us and mocked us in his bitter contempt.”

My official Favorite Thing of The Week must be the two posts about Swamp Thing playing golf with the Shadowpact, complete with photos (maybe NSFW, since the Black Orchid’s photo is basically a naked lady colored purple):

Abby, Suzy and I were invited by Blue Devil and Detective Chimp to come play golf with them today. […] The Chimp played an impressive first round, and challenged Abby to surprass it.”

“But then it came Black Orchid’s turn. […] “‘You want to play golf, Chimp. This is how you play it. Not with words, but with actions.'”

Later, Abby gives Swamp Thing some golfing lessons:

“In my first swing, unfortunately, I underestimated my strength and broke the club in half. Undaunted, Abby rushed into the house and came back out with a spare club to play with. This time, she showed me how to handle the club properly.”

This is the greatest weblog I have ever seen. You can pretty much stop making new weblogs now.

Dear Marvel trading cards…


…I hate you.

Love, Mike

EDIT: P.S. But you’ve made me love you again with Punisher Scratch ‘n’ Sniff cards:


If you scratch the cloud of smoke, it smells like…well, like a bunch of chemicals that have soaked into a piece of cardboard, but bless your little heart anyway.

In which Mike is a big jerk.

Things I never hear at the store:

“Is the new Youngblood out yet?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, it’s very rude for me to talk on my cell phone the entire time you’re trying to complete a transaction with me. Let me end my call so that we may conclude our business without distraction.”

“Does this ‘My Other Hard Drive Is The Millennium Falcon’* t-shirt look good on me?”

“Wow, I wasn’t expecting the new issue of Ultimates to be out so soon!”

“My young daughter is sure to love this new issue of Supergirl.”

“Mr. Sterling, put down the shotgun and broken wine bottle…we have the store surrounded.”

“Just look for the Comics Code Authority stamp, Little Billy…those are the comics that are appropriate for you.”

“$2.99? Well, considering the lower print runs and increased paper costs, not to mention the need to provide every person involved in the production and distribution process with a living wage, that’s actually quite a reasonable price for a comic book, and I’m glad to pay it.”

“‘Giant-Size Man-Thing?’ What’s so funny about that?”

“Hey, that last issue of Uncanny X-Men was really good!”

“I’d like to sell this old comic I have here…it’s kinda beat up, I think it’s pretty common, and, come to think of it, it’s really not all that old…a year or two at most. Actually, I’m sure it’s not worth anything….sorry to waste your time.”

“You know what I wish? I wish there was yet another new ongoing monthly Spider-Man title. A half-dozen just isn’t enough, frankly.”

“I was going to ask you to put this comic behind the counter for me so that I can come back to buy it later today, but, let’s face it, I’m going to get distracted and forget to return for it, so I might as well just leave it on the shelf.”

“Hey, Ian, you’re sober!”

“Do you have any other female-empowering comics, like Victoria’s Secret Service?”

“You know what I’d just love? If you secretly noted every stupid thing I say and post it later on your weblog. That’d be fantastic.”


My embarrassing moment of the day: asking one of our customers if he wanted the latest Spike one-shot, forgetting that he reads this site and finding out that he remembers my negative review of same. Um, heh. (You’re a trooper, Corey!)


The mighty Booksteve digs out a 20-year-old Swamp Thing fanzine cartoon for all to enjoy. Well done, sir.


Happy anniversary to Dave’s Long Box, you magnificent son of a bitch.

* Thanks to Employee Nathan for coming up with this mindbender. I don’t know what it means, either.

New comic book day…

…brought us a new issue of Alias Comics’ Victoria’s Secret Service:


“Thrust yourself crotch-first — into danger!”

Anyway, unlike previous weeks, our distributor managed to do a good job this time around with shipping us everything that appeared on the invoice, with only minor shortages (missing one copy of Blue Beetle) and a damaged comic. We even got a couple more copies of that issue of Spider-Girl we’d been shorted.

However, speaking of Blue Beetle…all you people who gnashed your teeth and tore your garments over the previous Blue Beetle biting the big one a few months back, all you folks who never read a single issue of a Blue Beetle comic and had fading memories of his appearances in 15-year-old Justice League comics who claimed your great love for the character, you’d better damn well buy this new Blue Beetle #1 or I’m going to go to your house and kick your ass.

Why, yes, I am well-regarded for my customer service, why do you ask?

We also received our t-shirts for Free Comic Book Day (May 6th, mark your calendars) with a reasonable amount of lead time, this time. That year we got them the Wednesday before the FCBD event…well, what good did that do, really? We need more time than that to be walking billboards, and thankfully we got that time this year.

Other new comic day notes:

Zombie Tales: The Dead #1 – another zombie-anthology, served up Boom! Studios-style, which short, (mostly) dark-humored stories about the shambling dead. All are good, but the standout to me was “Deadest Meat” by Keith Giffen and Ron Lim (whose work I haven’t seen in a while). This first person point-of-view story, told from the zombie’s perspective, gives us a look at a zombie semi-society that forms on a remote beach. Unique and particularly pathos-ridden, given the lead character’s awareness of the hopelessness of his situation, and the fate that awaits him. Worth the price of admission, but the rest of the book is entertaining as well.

All-Star Superman #3 – One of the stated purposes of this series was to evoke the Silver Age-era Superman stories, which short tales crammed full of bizarre ideas and memorable characters. The first two issues, while beautiful and engaging, and filled with odd concepts, still seemed just a tad…off from the Silver Age ideal, I guess. But this issue…Superman is confronted by competing heroes, who challenge him for Lois Lane…a challenge resolved in a remarkably schoolyard fashion. And I think that was the difference necessary. The Superman family of the Silver Age are immature, reacting to each other in childish ways. Just this wee bit of callback to those days in All-Star Superman was all it took to bring the Silver Age feel rushing back, at least for me.

Savage Dragon #124 – I love covers that look “pre-distressed” (even if they constantly make me do double-takes as I come across them in back-issues). Plus, this cover “liberates” one of my favorite Marvel story titles ever: “The Dismal Dregs of Defeat!”

Robin Screwso #1 – I can’t decide if this adult comic’s title is genius or stretching for a joke. It apparently involves a gal on an island, if you need help with the pun.

Superman/Batman #24 – I just read this comic, and I have no idea what’s going on. I think once #25 comes out, I’m gonna have to read the whole story from beginning to end and puzzle it out. Perhaps refreshing my memory with previous installments will help.

Star Wars: Return of Tag & Bink Special Edition #1 – Never enough funny Star Wars comics, for my money. Tag and Bink bumble their way through the movies’ events, with a particularly amusing revelation regarding just how exactly a blind Han Solo was able to so easily defeat Boba Fett on Jabba’s skiff. Fett fans who are utterly convinced of the character’s “coolness” may not want to read this issue.

East Coast Rising #1 – A Tokyopop original American manga…no, wait, don’t run away! This is a good’un, by a certain Becky Cloonan whom you may remember from Demo, and it’s all piratey and stuff. Give it a look.


For reading this far, you get a Superman Peanut Butter commercial, as found on the YouTube.

Man-Thing’s War on Swamp Thing!

Well, sorta. At least it gives me an excuse to link to this cool Nestor Redondo image from an old Comic Buyer’s Guide cover again:


So anyway, in Man-Thing #3 (March 1973), this editorial reply appeared in response to reader inquiries as to the similarities between the two swamp creatures:


Swamp Thing, openly disparaged in the letter column of his direct competitor. Okay, so it’s probably partially true, though I think the huge sales of Swampy’s first appearance in House of Secrets #92 had more to do with the creation of the ongoing series than, as implied above, anything Marvel may have been doing.

But that implication pales in comparison to this editorial reply in Man-Thing #2 (January 1979). A letter writer asks about Manny’s origin, confusing it with Swampy’s, which results in this response:


Oh SNAP! Oh no you didn’t! You didn’t just describe Swamp Thing as also being a Hulk knock-off!

Of course, that’s not to say the S.O.O.S. (“Supporters of Ol’ Swampy”) contingent didn’t get their licks in, as in this excerpt from Man-Thing #16 (April 1975):

Of course, the Swamp Thing comic ended up co-opting, in a way, the Man-Thing character as a background member of the Parliament of Trees – the plant elemental tribe elders, after a fashion. He first pops up in Swamp Thing #47 (April ’86), the issue where Swamp Thing first encounters the Parliament…what appears to be an overgrown version of Man-Thing appears in a two-page spread:


And later in the issue, you get an extreme foreground close-up of his face:


And he pops up a few more times, in this issue and a few others. Alas, no official crossover has ever been published, though I was hoping for maybe a throwaway panel in JLA/Avengers. I mean, heck, they devoted a panel to Rick Jones versus Snapper Carr, after all.

(And just so there’s no misunderstanding…I greatly enjoyed the original Man-Thing series as well, despite my pro-Swamp Thing bias. It really is prime Steve Gerber, at his most quirky, earnest, and experimental, accompanied by some great artists – Mike Ploog, John Buscema, Val Mayerik. Good stuff!)

(Where’s my Essential Man-Thing reprint volume?)