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(Previous entries in this series: 1 2 3 4 5)

So, what do you think this is?

A. A carrot way past the sale date

B. Some kind of horrible parasite

C. The Buffy the Vampire Slayer Plush Stake

If you said “C” — you would be correct. On page 458 of the new Diamond Previews: “Made from the highest quality plush materials, this multi-purpose stake can be used to scare off undead foes, and can be easily and safely stowed under your pillow while you sleep!” You can also keep it right next to your hand-carved wooden stake.

Other goodies from Previews:

p. 42 – What’s wrong with me that I think the King Kong with Ann bronze bust at $1,500 is ridiculous, but that the Kong Deluxe Collector’s Chess Set Board at $475 is absolutely fantastic?

p. 182 – The Fantastic Four Diorama: Human Torch Statue looks like it’s carved entirely out of hard candy.

p. 265 – Oh, sweet mother o’pearl, the worst comic book ever is returning to the stands, courtesy Devil’s Due Publishing, complete with a money back guarantee! However, all is not lost, as the quite entertaining Robert Rodi is writing it…which means the longtime Purgatori fans will probably be taken aback by their favorite character being polluted with “wit” and “interesting stories.”

p. 405 – A novelization of V for Vendetta, written by Steve Moore…the same Steve Moore that’s friends with original V writer Alan Moore?

p. 464 – G.I. Joe Dog Tag Replica Series 1: “This first series…features the tags of some of the greatest names in Joe history – like Hawk, Flint, and Gung-Ho – whose tags feature a replica grenade pin!”

p. 511 – Battlestar Galactica Levels Glass Shooters, which have characters associated with the different levels of alcohol you would presumably place within said shooter. The lowest rank is “Cylon,” the highest is “Galactite.” “Starbuck” is second-highest, in case you were wondering. Oddly, “Ellen Tigh,” a character on the new series that appears to be always drunk, is fourth.

p. 512 – Lots of Lost items, including autographed photos. Jorge Garcia as Hurley and Emile De Raven as Claire are the most expensive, at $39.99 a pop.

p. 518 – Darth Vader 18.5-inch Steinbach Nutcracker: “Crack your mixed nuts with the power of the Force using this Darth Vader 18.5″ nutcracker.” I honestly don’t know what to say to that.

p. 553 – Hold on, they’re reissuing the first Swamp Thing movie on DVD? I wonder if this means they cut out the offending footage that caused them to pull the first DVD release (under May 7-8).

From Doom Patrol #14 (Sep ’05):

“I mean, it’s not every day you have to adjust to the idea of your son’s brain being transplanted into the body of a four-armed gorilla!”

Pal Dorian spotted this in the new Previews at the shop today:

While I guess that’s a fairly accurate description of the kind of movie this is, we were wondering if there was any particular reason behind writing the solicitation information for the Revenge of the Sith DVD in this way…beyond someone just plain screwing up, that is. Is there some kind of odd Lucasfilm restriction on catalogues offering orders on ROTS in advance, so Diamond has to dance around the subject and not actually call it by name?

Hero Squared #1 should be in your finer comic shops today, and, like I said about the initial Hero Squared special, it’s a fun, not overly serious (but just serious enough) superhero book. It has the unique combination of slapstick, character-based humor, honest emotion, genuine pathos, and outright silliness that J. M. DeMatteis and Keith Giffen are known so well for from their work on Justice League (and, now, the current Defenders mini-series). Plus, the premise of the book (a superhero is partnered up with his less-than-super parallel universe counterpart) is, as far as I’m able to recall, unique. I’ve been reading superhero comics for 30 years now, so I appreciate it when someone comes up with a new take on the old genre. Also, Joe Abraham’s art is fun and expressive, perfectly matching the script.

So go buy it already. Let’s give this guy some incentive to keep publishing this comic!

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Starting tomorrow, my e-mail access will be spotty at best for a few days. So, if you have anything you want me to see right away, better send it now!

Well, I’ve been putting a daily post (or posts) on this website for over a year and a half now. And, I think, I’ve been fairly successful with this site, since I started this thing expecting no one to really care, and I’ve managed to work my way up to a pretty large amount of traffic (well, for a comics weblog, anyway). I’ve had a lot of fun, showing off goofy comics, spouting my mouth off on various topics, and interacting with a lot of you swell folk out there who were nice enough to have tolerated my nonsense for this long. And, somewhere along the way, maybe, just maybe, we all learned a little something.

Unfortunately, as fun as all this is, my real life must take precedence. So it is with a heavy heart that I must regretfully announce…

…that my daily posts may be a little shorter than usual over the next week or two. I’m going to be in the process of moving to a new house, so it’s going to be a little difficult generating new content at the same time. Plus, I’ll be on the courtesy dial-up until the DSL service kicks in again, and I already know that’s going to stink.

It’s going to be a little rough, but I still plan on providing at least small updates every day until everything’s back to relative normalcy. It’s not anything to quit weblogging over, at any rate.

And, by some odd coincidence, pal Dorian is also in the process of moving. Must be catching.

1. Pal Ian came by the store today, and gave me the greatest gift one man can give another man.

Yes, that’s right, he gave me a Stealth movie poster.

1a. By the way, at that Stealth link, you can apparently “download the desktop experience.” Oh, and “fear the sky,” too.

2. Kid Chris brought up something that I’m ashamed I didn’t think of myself. Do you think that Alicia being a blind sculptress was de-emphasized in the Fantastic Four movie so that people didn’t think they were ripping off the whole “blind sculptress” thing from Lionel Richie’s video for the song “Hello?”

3. Okay, now ever since Power Girl was first introduced, there’s been some measure of…comment over her…buxomness, as it were. Now that she’s currently being featured in JSA Classified, the debate has risen again, particularly since she seems even more buoyant than usual. Now, I think I’m of two minds on this. On one hand, the cheesecake is played mostly for laughs (and reactions to her statuesque qualities have, in recent years, usually been used to make the male characters look ridiculous). On the other hand, it is page after page of drawings of a woman with improbably large breasts. On the other, other hand, the artist of this story is a woman, Amanda Conner, and she stated in a recent Wizard interview that she purposely emphasized PG’s assets. On the other, other, etc. hand, the readers of superhero comics are predominantly male, and the creative teams know what they have to do to get guys to part with their $2.50. But, then again, this series promises to clean up PG’s convoluted back story, and to longtime DC continuity geeks, that’s hard to resist.

So, yeah, I’ll be reading it. I like how Geoff Jones has been writing her, and I’m one of those aforementioned DC continuity geeks, so I’d like to see where he goes with it.

And we’ve nearly sold out it at our store, by the way. Sex sells…who knew?

3a. Pal Dorian pointed out (and I should’ve realized it myself) that this story may follow up on situations from Grant Morrison’s Animal Man run. I certainly hope so, if it is what I think it is.

4. I don’t think I can get through a day at work without Robocop being mentioned at least once.

“Lessons from a comic book superhero”

“When the cosmic rays made his body malleable and stretchable, Dr. Richards didn’t adopt a lame superhero name like Plastic Man. He called himself Mr. Fantastic.”

“Batman Begins: The comic book finally grows up”

“I have never enjoyed a single one of these bombastic optical orgies. Comic books on screen are essentially lies. They try to create an illusion of multi-dimensionality for what is predominantly a uni-focal experience. The characters therefore appear more chic and stylish than substantial.”

“Everything silly is serious again”

“…The grittiness that had entered comic-book storytelling through [Frank] Miller had diffused from Batman into other storylines, and what had been unique to Batman quickly came to characterize the industry. Specialty shops became lone sanctuaries for proponents of that industry, and comic book readers became laughing stocks in the eyes of the mainstream.”

Upcoming happenings on Smallville

“Then [Tom] Welling added that this year, ‘Smallville’ is digging deeper into the comic book’s lore by having Clark explore the Fortress of Solitude and meet the lamest superhero* ever, Aquaman.”

“Want his attention? Send up a bat signal”

“Be it Batman, Superman, Deathstroke or Green Arrow, [sports agent Drew] Rosenhaus knows his superheroes. His research material – stacks of hundreds of comic books – is piled high only a few steps away in the walk-in closet.”

“In Brightest Day, In Darkest Night”

“Believe it or not, some people think comic books are stupid.”

* I’m going to assume the “lamest superhero” comment was embellishment on the part of the article’s writer, and not paraphrasing Mr. Welling. Still, kinda harsh.

Here’s the cover image from Life with Archie #128 (Dec 1972):

Let’s take a closer look at the guy in the lower left corner:

Now the guys from the motorcycle gang in the upper right look like your typical Archie Comics house style ruffians. But that other fella…that’s a man that’s seen things. Terrible things. And he seems remarkably out of tune with the standard Archie style. There’s something almost Rat Fink-ian about that face. It’s about as out of place as the occasional walk-on appearances of the lady sophisticates of Riverdale.

I’ve tested your patience this week with a couple big posts in a row, so let me just point out a couple things that have amused me recently:

1. Beaucoupkevin found inspiration, where others found confusion and consternation, in my post from yesterday.

2. Harry Potter fan fiction writers are annoyed that events in the new novel have played havoc with their own stories. (via pal Metaphorge) Okay, not a comics link, you got me.

3. A “SNIKT!” card from Marvel Comics Monopoly:

I’ve read some complaints here and there about how in All Star Batman and Robin, Batman grabbing the recently-orphaned Dick Grayson and informing him that he’s “been drafted…into a war” seemed to be a little on the abrupt side. So the kid’s parents are killed, and Batman just up and decides to make him his sidekick, just like that? Well, it’s not too far off from the original Robin origin way back in 1940’s Detective Comics #38.

First, Dick’s parents fall victim to tampered-with trapeze wires:

Following the “accident,” Dick overhears the miscreants responsible, but before he can act:

Bruce Wayne, who was in the audience that evening and witnessed the murder, shows up as the Batman and dissuades young Mr. Grayson from contacting the authorities:

He immediately shanghais the kid from the circus in the Batmobile, away from all the authorities that probably would have some small amount of concern about a recently-orphaned child:

After about a panel or two’s worth of convincing on Dick’s part, Batman decides to make the child his partner in crime-fighting, making him swear an oath that very evening:

…and then the training regimen begins (“As far as swinging ropes go, you can probably teach me a trick or two,” says Batman to the young trapeze artist), and by the end of the page, Dick’s in his Robin costume, ready to strike fear in the hearts of people easily startled by boys in chainmail shorts.

So, basically, Miller’s take on the origin, at least as it seems in that first All Star issue, is more or less on par with the original. Well, maybe with a few more shots of gals in underwear, but some advances in storytelling must be allowed for, surely.

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Which reminds me…it’s a comic by Frank Miller and Jim Lee, and people are surprised by the presence of scantily-clad women?

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I noticed this blurb on the cover of the new Invincible Ultimate Collection hardcover yesterday:

“Collecting the first 13 issues of what is probably the best superhero comic book in the universe.”

Oh, c’mon, what’s with this “probably” crap? Fake humility ain’t gonna get you anywhere! Stan slapped “The World’s Greatest Comics Magazine” across the top of Fantastic Four, right? Go ahead and put “the best superhero comic book in the universe” on the cover without qualifiers…that’s fine with me. Or even “screw you, Superman! Our comic rules, your comic drools.” Whatever. Why be shy?

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One of the most linked articles on this site is this one about the story explaining how Superman’s glasses and his power of super-hypnosis protect his secret identity. Well, here’s an interesting discussion that spins off from that post, in which it’s postulated that such extreme means probably aren’t necessary in protecting his secret.