I looked up “reductionism” on Wikipedia and now I’m an expert, obviously.

§ December 14th, 2020 § Filed under question time § 3 Comments

Hey, let me tackle a few more of your questions:

John Lancaster casts the following at me:

“Can you make sense of a non-reductionist view of theoretical entities? Please convey your answer in the form of a cipher.”

The thought of, for example, explaining Sluggo by imagining his soul, inferring his wants and desires and his “lit-ness,” rather than simply observing his stubbly head and his patched jacket and drawing conclusions from those alone…well, it all falls apart when one realizes there is nothing theoretical about Sluggo. He is as real as you or me. …Oh, a cipher. Well, “[picture of a garden slug] – O” and all that.

“Oh, and who would win in a fight; Zeep the Living Sponge, or Color Kid? Darn, that’s two questions – just worry about answering the first one.”

Oh, sure, now you tell me.

Zeep, the original “Dial H for Hero” version: loses to Color Kid

Zeep, the character from Hero Hotline: totally beats Color Kid. …Look, I don’t explains ’em, I just reports ’em.

• • •

ExistentialMan questions my existence with

“If you could break down your comics hobby (as a reader, collector, retailer, whatever) into discrete phases, what would they be?”

Hmm. I think you mean “chronologically,” rather than “concurrently compartmentalized,” I hope, since that’s easier to answer. For the latter, there’s a lot of “wow, this comic sounds terrible” versus “then again, it’s probably going to sell great, better order lots” (and variations thereof) happenin’ whenever I’m doing the monthly comics order.

Chronologically, I was a reader first, getting scattered issues of various comics as a very young Mikester. It was probably Star Wars that turned me into a “collector,” wanting to pick up every issue as it came out as opposed to an issue here and there as I’d happen upon them. A trip to stay with cousins down in San Diego shortly thereafter revealed to me their own large and organized comic book horde, which inspired me to organize and keep track of my own gatherings.

I was never much of a condition hound on my own books, so I didn’t get into that aspect of being a collector, for the most part. I did upgrade the occasional old Swamp Thing comic if the one I had was particularly worked. And for a very brief period of my collector phase I did dip my toes into the “investor” thing, picking up a comic or two with the expectations of turning them over for Big Bucks later. Anyway, that was stupid and of course it didn’t work out, and I quickly stopped doing that. Because it was stupid. Like I said.

And then in ’88 I entered comics retailing. The end.

Well, okay, it didn’t end. In fact, if anything, each segment built upon the other. I was a reader, then I “collected” (i.e. put some effort and care into gathering and storing these comics) while still reading them. And now, as a retailer, I still read and collect them, so it’s all merged together now. Though “collect” is kind of the wrong term at the moment, given I never seem to find the time to sort them properly at home any more.

• • •

Mike Loughlin has the last lough with

“Congratulations, DC has decided you are the perfect writer to helm The Muck-nificent Swamp Thing!(NOTE: I don’t work for AT&T/DC and the preceding sentence is a bald-faced lie)! You even get to pick an artist and a back-up feature starring a mystic and/or horror DC property. Which artist and character do you choose, and who would you choose to draw the back-up? Since those three questions fit into one inquiry, it looks like one question to me. If you disagree, feel free to discard the part about a back-up.”

Ooooh you sneaky Petes with your multi-part “single questions.” YOU’LL ALL GET YOURS but I’ll probably answer ’em anyway because I’m a soft touch.

So, I get to write a Swamp Thing comic, eh? Either Swamp Thing’s Adventures in Time and Space or Swamp Thing’s Good Time Jamboree, I haven’t decided which. As for artist…well, I would pick my Close and Personal Friend, the increasingly hirsute Matthew Digges, based on this drawing he gave me a while back:


…or if Matt’s not available, I’d ask Francesco Francavilla, because I’ve been looking at a Swamp Thing drawing of his as wallpaper on my store computer for the past six years and his art is great.

Back-up: would have to be “Stanley and His Monster,” with shared art chores by Jaime and Gilbert Hernandez. Jaime would draw Stanley, Gilbert would draw His Monster. You’re already picturing this in your head, and are amazed at its perfection.

3 Responses to “I looked up “reductionism” on Wikipedia and now I’m an expert, obviously.”

  • @misterjayem says:

    Truly, I am amazed at its perfection.

    — MrJM

  • John Lancaster says:

    I was pretty sure you and I were a couple, of only a handful, that knew there were two Zeep the Living Sponge. You’re answer is the correct answer. And where’s my Absolute Edition for Hero Hotline…It’s in DC’s court now!

    As for Sluggo, I prefer the ontological approach. Sluggo’s nature of being is simply, “lit”.

  • Daniel T says:

    I’ve been thinking about Stanley and His Monster by Los Bros Hernandez a lot since I read this yesterday and maybe I have you beat.

    Stanley: Mike Allred
    Monster: Jeff Smith

    Stanley: Paul Chadwick
    Monster: Peter Bagge

    Stanley: Adam Hughes
    Monster: Mike Mignola

    And the one I don’t think would be the best but the one I’d most like to see:

    Stanley: George Perez
    Monster: S. Clay Wilson

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