No, seriously, you need at LEAST three copies.

§ September 21st, 2011 § Filed under fakeapstylebook, question time, self-promotion § 12 Comments

So, yeah, sorry about that post yesterday. I really meant to keep it short, honest, but, you know, get me talking about Swamp Thing, and look what happens. But at least I do it here, where you all have avenues of escape, and not at the store, where I could possibly corner some poor bastard and discuss Patchwork Man continuity for half an hour.

I answered a couple of questions in yesterday’s comments already, but let me address a couple more here today:

Dwayne the Canoe Guy asks:

“I saw today that is selling a discount subscription to Swamp Thing and recently featured Justice League. Tanga normally discounts boardgames & novelty electronics. Does this discounting indicate that DC is desperate?”

I’d say the fact that DC restarted all their books with new #1s was already a pretty good sign of desperation. But no, offering cheap subscriptions to comics on a discount deal site sounds more like loss-leading promotion than “oh dear God someone please buy our comics.” It’s just another venue to hawk their wares, rather than just pushing their offerings through the usual places.

eee-gah wants to know, in response to my slightly snarky comment about blood ‘n’ guts in DC’s superhero books:

“Has anyone ever complained to you at the shop about the level of gore in a random DC book?”

No, not really “complained” as such. The few people who have noted it usually do so with a sense of…bemusement. Like, “oh, look what DC did THIS time.” But I haven’t had any angry parents stomp into the store and gripe that their precious Little Billy picked up a copy of Teen Titans: Risk – A Call to Arms #1 and was offended by all the violence therein. But I have had a parent complain about Lesbian Batwoman, so I guess I know where the lines are drawn in our neighborhood.

Also…it’s been a while since this happened, but I always like to mention that one mother who complained that the Spider-Man comics her son was reading were “too sexy.” Specifically, the Steve Ditko Spider-Man comics her son was reading in reprints. That’s probably the one and only time that particular complaint was leveled at Ditko’s Spidey.

• • •

Okay, so you’ve read Fake AP Stylebook, you’ve bought your mandatory three copies per household of the Fake AP Stylebook book Write More Good, and maybe some of you are following our lonely, lonely Twitter feed The Content Farm. Now, The Bureau Chiefs bring you…Fake Pew Research, featuring improbable statistics for an intractable society.

Anyway, as pal Dave L. so accurately puts it, it’s just another goofy thing we’re doing to make each other laugh, and hopefully it’ll make some of you laugh too.

12 Responses to “No, seriously, you need at LEAST three copies.”

  • I’ve not had any complaints about Ditko’s sexy babe art, but I did have a kid inquire about Ditko’s personal works, particularly Mr. A, and at one point in our conversation, he was silent for a moment, then said “Yeah… Ditko’s pretty chill!”

  • fl000b says:

    Do you remember what was specifically “too sexy” about the Ditko Spidey? Like was it Gwen Stacey or Betty Brant or possibly faceless Mary Jane Waston?

  • Brett says:

    I have never complained about the gore in DC comics, but it has stopped me from buying them or sharing them with my son. It always strikes me as odd that they insert them seemingly at random. Months go by with normal comicbooky bang pow stuff, then you get a graphic impaling, an arm ripped off or a pile of mutilated bodies. I am not going to complain to you or to DC, you can’t do anything and they can publish what they like, but they are preventing my son from being a big DC fan while he is young.

    P.S. Could care less about lesbians and the like.

  • Old Bull Lee says:

    Ditko’s Betty Brant was pretty damn sexy.

    Get that kid some Mr. A comics!

  • Roger Green says:

    I remember the Miller Daredevil, which was pretty cool, but sure would not want my daughter reading. Of course, I didn’t HAVE a daughter at the time…

    Still, in my retail experience, few people ever complained about violence, but did about sex, from the Heavy Metal covers (placed discretely with the undergrounds, FCOL) to the too buxom superheroines.

  • swamp mark says:

    Since you are in “explaining” mode,I’ve got questions about Project Superman.I back-ordered #2 on your recommendation and now I’m wondering if #3 explains what is going on with Dr. Linda Ridge.Was she killed in #2 or not?Does she even appear in #3?I take it this all takes place before she met Alec or is it a seperate timeline altogether?I would hope Snyder picks up these threads in Swampy’s book,but you never know. Any help would be appreciated.Thanx pal!

  • JB says:

    Speaking of the Bureau Chiefs, guess what I picked up at my local Borders on the next to last day they were in business, at 90% off cover price?

    If I ever make it cross country and in to your shop, I’ll give you the value of your royalty in person.

    … but I did buy Swampy because of you, so you’re supporting DC’s bottom line, at least.

  • A.L. Baroza says:

    Ditko did give Spidey quite the badonkadonk during his run. Also, his hips couldn’t unsway. I’d have to go check to see if Ditko put Spidey in the “brokeback” pose, though.

  • kate says:

    I don’t have kids, and I like lesbians in fiction, but I’m with Brett, the violence just gets too much sometimes. So, I don’t complain to you (since I’m in Boston and all), I just don’t buy some stuff, and I’ve sent them letters (or, one letter) explaining why.

  • Alex says:

    I made a point to ask the comic shop proprietor at the place I used to shop at quite a bit in college (I was in town again for a weekend) about his thoughts on the “darkening” of the DCU over the last years. I mentioned that it had really put me off their stuff, and was still pretty much keeping me away.

    He didn’t say much more than “You’re not the only one that’s noticed that… it’s defiantly something people have pointed out.”.

  • Steven E. McDonald says:

    Well, the new Catwoman #1 should get some people grumbling…violence, cat endangerment, and bat-shagging. I mean, really, was the full page image of Catwoman humping the half-naked Batman *really* needed? (It’s a glorious bit of objectifying of both characters, really it is.

    Maybe DC thinks it’s time to build up the audience by doing a softcore take with some of the books — you know, This Ain’t Catwoman XXX: A Porn Parody and whatnot?

  • Pietro says:

    Well, I was kinda going to keep it to myself, but since it seems it’s a shared feeling…
    I read Batman and Robin 1 this week and, frankly, the last page was pure torture porn for me.
    I’m not going to hack the writer or the artist, they are both great pros, and as someone who can’t stomach Saw or Hostel or any other “contemporary horror” flick, I’m probably too old for this.
    But the gag, the tear in the eye, the dialogue, the moaning… it was too much for me. Kudos to the artist for making such an impressive page, it really was impressive for me, but for the wrong reasons.