Frankly, if I were Kim Luc, I’d still tell those jerks to go jump in a lake.

§ March 6th, 2012 § Filed under justice league § 14 Comments

Dude, whoa:


That’s a dick move right there. And that guy in the yellow shirt…just look at that smug bastard. Kim Luc should just pop him one.

Anyway, Superman happens to be flying by and, having overheard this meeting of the Junior John Birch Society, decides to step in:


And I guess everyone’s learned their lesson, and fast, because sometime between that first scene and Superman finishing his gentle admonishment of these misguided children, “JLA FAN CLUB” was hastily scrawled on Kim Luc’s shirt.

And yes, Red Tornado is colored yellow. I don’t know, maybe Superman’s telling it wrong and the kids somehow now think a character with “red” in his name is mostly yellow. Also, not revealed by Superman? Every member of the Justice League? Totally Communist. Oh no! An ironic comeuppance for those three character members of the JLA Fan Club from Anytown, U.S.A.

This is from The Secret Origin of the Justice League of America mini-comic that came packaged with some toy or ‘nother in the 1980s…you can read more about it here.

14 Responses to “Frankly, if I were Kim Luc, I’d still tell those jerks to go jump in a lake.”

  • Mike Zeidler says:

    I think Supes meant only one of them is Human. That’s really dependent on Wonder Woman’s origin at the time too, so really none of them could be considered “Human.”

  • Mikester says:

    Mike – Hmmm…good point.

  • Rich Handley says:

    “One of them isn’t even human.”

    Hmmm….

    An android, a Martian, a Kryptonian and a lone human.

    Good math there, Superman.

  • Supes used heat-vision to scorch the fan club logo on the kid’s shirt… and chest… and lungs.

    ~P~

  • Aaron Poehler says:

    Plus Wonder Woman was arguably a really well-shaped clay golem until quite recently, after all. NO ONE IS HUMAN

  • Rottgutt says:

    So, wait… didn’t most of these heroes have secret identities that required them being U.S. citizens?

    Martian Manhunter was impersonating the dead police detective John Jones, so he’d have citizenship by proxy.

    Wonder Woman worked in some vague military intelligence department of the U.S. government would have to have at least faked being a U.S. citizen as Diana Prince.

    (Katar Hol) Hawkman was a museum curator, so he might be able to squeek by not being a U.S. citizen. He’d just need a social security number and/or a green card.

  • The Mutt says:

    I guess that was his Kim Lucky day.

  • Interstate Shogun says:

    “C’mon, Kim Luc–let’s play!”

    Then….KOREA!

  • Eric L says:

    Know what? Justice League of America was a pretty stupid name for this group.

  • Jon H says:

    “Supes used heat-vision to scorch the fan club logo on the kid’s shirt… and chest… and lungs.”

    Kim Luc’s shadow was burned into the sidewalk.

  • Anonymous says:

    “But, Supes! Why has Swamp Thing never joined the JLA?”

  • IvoryTower says:

    Don’t they repeatedly have ‘damned aliens, we don’t need your kind’ angst in the Superman comic?

  • MrJM says:

    “That was a well-reasoned argument for comprehensive common-sense immigration reform, Superman!”

    — MrJM

  • Rob says:

    Kinda like that moment in “Swamp Thing” when Batman defends Abby’s canoodling with Alec by enumerating the number of superheroes who aren’t human…including “that fellow from Metropolis.” To which everyone goes “OMG WE MUST RELEASE THE WOMAN IMMEDIATELY.”