§ February 23rd, 2007 § Filed under Uncategorized Comments Off on PLEASE SPEND MONEY INDISCRIMINATELY.

As a seller of funnybooks, I would like to present my unbiased rebuttal to Kevin’s recent essay:


Buy everything. If it features a character you like, buy it. If it features a character that once met a character you like, buy it. If it features a creator you like, buy it. If it features a creator you don’t like, buy it so you can complain about the creator online. If you’re not enjoying reading the comic, hell, keep buying it, it’s bound to get better eventually. What are you, a quitter? You don’t want to have any holes in your collection, do you? Of course you don’t. Other comic fans will laugh and point at you, and rightfully so. So BUY MORE COMICS. If there are multiple covers, buy one of each. In fact, what you should do is buy two of each cover, so you can keep a set aside for future investment potential, and have a set for reading…it’s important to have one of each cover, in case you want to read the story underneath one cover as opposed to the other. Oh, and crossover events, you gotta get all those. You’re gonna feel left out if you don’t know what’s going on in the superhero multiverse of your choice. (Or, heck, choice nothing…you should be reading all the superhero multiverses.) Let’s see, you’ll need to buy the primary crossover event, and all the tie-ins…and you’ll probably want to buy two sets of the tie-ins, so you can store one set with in the storage box devoted just to the crossover, and the other set where the titles would be normally filed. That way, if you have an issue of Bungee Cord Warriors that ties into Crisis of Infinite Pants, you can have one copy in your Bungee Cord Warriors box and another in your Crisis of Infinite Pants box. See how that works? You may want to think about buying a third set for actual reading…perhaps third and fourth sets so you can store those along with the keeper sets in the separate boxes.

So BUY MORE COMICS. I don’t care what. Just buy some. Preferably from me. Give me your money. DO IT NOW.

…You people are so damned lucky I use my powers for good, and not for evil.

In other, less sarcastic news:

“The Infinite Crisis of Comics” – article on New York Comic Con focuses on gradual death of superhero comics, and why Marvel and DC’s output won’t appeal to anyone not already reading their books.

Live-action Justice League of America movie threatened.

“United States: The World’s Batman?”

“President Bush reminds Americans that he believes the U.S. is the sole force responsible for protecting the world from evil. Likewise, in the original 1989 film Batman, Bruce Wayne believes that he must defend the city ‘because nobody else can.’ Batman and America have devoted themselves to the idea that one man or one nation can address the myriad of problems the world faces. Consequently, Batman and the U.S. take it upon themselves to fight the rogues of the world—be they dumpy cranks like the Penguin and Kim Jong-il, or menaces who always answer questions by posing them, like the Riddler and Iranian President Ahmadinejad. In doing so, they invest their very beings into attaining a specific world order. And they even have the help of staunch sidekicks: Batman’s got Robin, America’s got Tony Blair!”

Hey, it’s pal Dorian‘s birthday today! Happy birthday, boy chum!

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