"Regard each encounter as if it could be your last!"
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5t.jpg)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Authorized Martial Arts Training Manual #5 (1986)
Even opening this comic means CERTAIN DEATH for you, the reader:
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5d.jpg)
Somehow, I don’t see finding “many, many hours” to spend alone will be a problem for anyone actually using this comic as a training manual:
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5bt.jpg)
“Mr. Comic Retailer, do you have a comic book that will instruct Little Billy on how best to disembowel and kill his enemies?”
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5x.jpg)
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5y.jpg)
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5z.jpg)
At last, some sensible advice:
![](https://www.progressiveruin.com/images/tmntma5at.jpg)