They’re all dead now.
CLICK TO GALAPAGOS TORTOISE-SIZE
…Or maybe some of them are still patiently waiting, no longer baby turtles, in some out-of-the-way warehouse somewhere in New York, where a few times a week a guy in his 80s pops in, refreshes the water and the Turtle Chow in the tank, and checks the mailbox looking for any newly mailed-in coupons, hoping that someday — someday soon — his burden will be lifted.
“Moss-protected package”
No. You were right the first time. They’re dead.
What? 58 years isn’t even a ripe old age for a turtle.
Also, four of them were mutated into humanoids by the Ooze and trained as martial artists. They survive to this day.
Mike, you’re a terrible person. Keep up the good work! ;)
Keeper of the Turtles – It’s not a job, it’s a calling.
Saddest Progressive Ruin post ever.
Though I do like how the headline suggests that you will get 1,000 baby turtles. Boy, Mom is gonna be peeved.
Mike, I’ve taken to heart this lesson you tortoise.