You are currently browsing the archives for March, 2011

I helped write a book, and I would like you to buy it.

§ March 11th, 2011 § Filed under self-promotion § 11 Comments

So I’ve talked a few times before about this, but now, with the release date nearly upon us, hopefully you will excuse me if I lay the hard sell on you:


Write More Good, the book written by the folks who inflicted Fake AP Stylebook upon the world, is due for release on April 5th. It’s not just gags from the Twitter feed, but mostly all-new material carefully and lovingly handcrafted by me, pal Dorian, and a few other roustabouts and ne’er-do-wells. I think it’s laugh-out-loud funny, and some of the stuff the other guys wrote is pretty good, too. Some excerpts from the book should be available online shortly, and I’ll let you know when they start popping up.

It’s a satirical look at the world of journalism, a silly exercise in wordplay, and I also wrote some fart jokes. Two in the same chapter! The science chapter, even! I used to get in trouble as a kid for saying the word “fart,” and now I get paid for writing it! America…what a country!

And, hey, check that out. Legendary film critic Roger Ebert wrote the introduction. Let me repeat that…Roger freakin’ Ebert wrote the introduction. Is your mind blown? I know mine is.

Anyway, the book is a lot of fun, and we had a great time writing it, and I hope you folks try it out and enjoy it as well. You can preorder a copy right here from my site:


…or you can pick it up from many other online booksellers listed here.

• • •

In related news, I told you before about how some of us Bureau Chiefs folks were working on a new project, a parody of those “how-to” guides of dubious usefulness that litter the web. Well, that site has moved from its Tumblr beginnings to its own domain at The Content Farm. Updated daily with all new instructional guides that are just about as reliable as your typical content farm, but intentionally funny! There is also a Twitter feed that not only informs you when the site is updated, but also features original short-form material as well. So go ahead…follow us on Twitter. It’s free!

• • •

Phew! Thanks for sticking through that, gang. I’ll probably post a brief reminder in a week or so, and another big push just before the Big Day, so consider yourself forewarned.

Yes, the “$3.50” is handwritten.

§ March 10th, 2011 § Filed under advertising, jack kirby § 6 Comments

BEHOLD: the backer-board-sign-thingie that slipped into the top of the counter dump for Jack Kirby’s Battle for a Three Dimensional World:


Used to be that I’d see copies of this thing (the comic, not the counter dump sign) all the time. Now I can’t remember the last time I’ve had one pass through the store.
 
 
(updated 8/2017)

In brief…

§ March 9th, 2011 § Filed under sir-links-a-lot § 1 Comment

…because I spent my blogging time Tuesday night working up a post that I decided at the last second to save for later. Urgh.

Anyway, I helped Kevin Church with a recent Daily Batman entry

…Mark Andrew Smith is seeking Kickstarter contributions to fund the next volume of The New Brighton Archeological Society

…Gerry Giovinco has more stories about his early encouragement in the world of comics, including an encounter with Arnold Roth…

…Andrew whips out a Nobody’s Favorite that I can remember selling, if not lately (like, in the last decade or so)…

…pal Dorian presents his latest Previews for Gays

…and the aforementioned Dorian, along with Ken Lowery, recently posted a new “In A World” in which they look at the latest batch of movie trailers. A perennial favorite here at Progressive Ruin Industries.

Perhaps I should mention the name Playboy a few more times to really goose those Google searches.

§ March 8th, 2011 § Filed under advertising § 11 Comments

Yet another item from the many mystery boxes of promotional / retailer goodies:


Clicking on the above image will reveal a 1988 flyer from Dark Horse Comics, ballyhooing Concrete‘s mention in Harlan Ellison’s Playboy article about comic books. In particular, warning retailers that this kind of exposure could increase demand for the then quickly-forthcoming Concrete Color Special, and orders should be adjusted accordingly!

This being about 23 years ago, and just about the time of my entry into the high-finance world of funnybook-selling, I don’t really recall a huge Playboy-fueled bump in demand for the Concrete Color Special. In fact, I bet we probably still have a copy or four left over from our initial order on those. If I were to hazard a guess, if there was a transfer of readers between the world of Playboy and the world of comics, there were probably more comic book fans who sought out that issue of Playboy to read a Harlan Ellison article about funnybooks, than Playboy fans who went looking for a comic book about a giant rocky dude. And if that were the case, I’m sure Playboy appreciated that extra 0.001% bump in sales.

Honestly, I have no idea. Like I said, I don’t have any specific memory of anyone coming into the shop and declaring “I have read of this Concrete comic in the newest issue of Playboy, and by God, I must have it,” assuming anyone would actually tell us that they read about it in Playboy. But I don’t remember it selling much better than normal, aside perhaps from the slight bump in curious readers who’d been avoiding the critically-acclaimed comic book because it was black and white, but were finally tempted to sample the series when presented with a self-contained full-color one-shot. Perhaps other folks present in comics retail at the time may have had different experiences.

Anyway, it’s an interesting flyer, and regardless of the results, I appreciate Dark Horse’s efforts in informing retailers and taking advantage of media coverage. Plus, that gag panel on the flyer featuring Concrete is pretty cute.

By the way, I remember reading that Playboy article at the time, sitting there in the barber shop waiting for my turn in the chair and feelin’ all adult and stuff, picking up the nudie magazine to, um, read an article about comic books. Yes, I actually did read Playboy for the articles. Or, at least, an article.

Do French-Canadians even do the “eh?” thing? I have no idea.

§ March 7th, 2011 § Filed under advertising § 13 Comments

Some other goodies from 1980s Comic Images retailer ads…bumper stickers!


I like the simplicity of this one…they should bring it back to tie into the Thor movie. Except they’d probably screw it up by, I don’t know, putting Chris Hemsworth’s face in place of the heart, or something.



I only got through year 2 of my X-Men language classes in high school, so I might be a little rusty. All I remember is “I…hurt” and “tovarisch.”



“Bonjour! Je m’appelle Puck, et je t’aime, eh?”



That’s going to make it hard to practice my X-Men-speaking skills.



I understand he also “bites,” and that he “never drinks…wine.” You could’ve had a whole line of Dracula bumper stickers there, Comic Images.



Sorry, Iceman!


I know Puck isn’t French-Canadian. But, c’mon, “Je m’appelle Northstar, et je t’aime” isn’t nearly as funny.

“We heard you like skulls, so we put a skull on your skull.”

§ March 6th, 2011 § Filed under advertising § 7 Comments

From an April ’88 Comic Images retailer solicitation sheet comes this, one of the greatest Punisher merchandise taglines ever:


Tagline presumably would also work with a Bi-Beast hat.

Sluggo Saturday #96.

§ March 5th, 2011 § Filed under sluggo saturday § 4 Comments

CLEARLY UPWIND

FROM CELEBRITY NEWS

from Nancy and Sluggo #181 (March-April 1961)

I may have twisted my arm while trying to pat myself on the back.

§ March 4th, 2011 § Filed under blogging about blogging is a sin, cartoons, superman § 3 Comments

From the Superman: The Animated Series episode “The Late Mr. Kent” (originally aired November 1997) comes this bit of editorial commentary:


…”Fans Nix New Duds,” almost certainly referring to the new costume hoohar which began in the early 1997 Superman comics :


Oh, those Superman Cartoon guys. (For more on that costume, here’s a post on that topic that I did nearly a year ago which I still think isn’t half-bad.)

• • •

So long as I’m congratulating myself, I was reminded a few days ago of a particular entry on my site…an entry that, if I were to pick my top ten favorite posts I’ve ever done here, would almost certainly be near the top. So, today’s Progressive Ruin Phunnybook Phlashback: BEHOLD.

• • •

Hey. Hey, you. If you’ve got your blog set up that your sidebar links to other blogs include the title and / or the first line or two of said linked blogs, and you were good enough to include me in that sidebar, please do me a favor. Take a look at my link there. If the excerpt from my site reads “REMINDER! Update your Progressive Ruin feed links,” then…well, please update your Progressive Ruin feed links. Here’s the current feed, which is also linked to by the “SYNDICATE” button at the upper right hand corner of my site. Thank you!

Progressive Ruin presents…the End of Civilization.

§ March 3rd, 2011 § Filed under End of Civilization § 19 Comments

Well, if you’ve been waiting for the onslaught of Green Lantern merchandising crap to begin, this is your lucky month, friends! I barely even touch upon all the GL stuff in today’s EoC entry, but trust me, there’s plenty. Like, the GL board game that’s basically just Trouble, complete with Pop-O-Matic, but with Green Lantern pictures all over it. Or the game where, apparently, you shoot marbles at little Green Lantern stand-ups. Crazy, man. Anyway, see for yourself as you follow along in your March 2011 edition of Diamond Previews:

p. 113 – Aquaman Death of a Prince TP:


Seems like an odd thing to be reprinting, unless DC is gearing up for the Aquababy: Rebirth mini-series.

p. 116 – Power Girl Bomb Squad TP:


So I was just doing my initial glance-through of the catalog when I saw this solicitation out of the corner of my eye. I immediately registered “Power Girl” and “Squad” in the title, but I’ll give you one guess what I briefly, shamefully, misread “Bomb” as. Go on, guess.

p. 136-7 – Green Lantern (Movie) 1:4 Scale Hal Jordan & Sinestro Deluxe Busts:


“No one will be admitted during the thrilling Jello-wrestling scene.”

p. 243 – Crossed Psychopath #4:


Reasonably certain it takes about as long to read the solicitation text as it does the actual comic.

p. 316 – Clint #9:


Well, issue #3 was close, but I think this is the first cover to fully exploit the primary reason this magazine was called Clint.

p. 349 – Green Lantern Movie Young Reader Books:


“And then there was that time Arisia and I were in love…sure, she made herself look older with her ring, but she was actually just about your age, boys and girls!”

p. 353 – The Transformers Vault HC:


Oh, so there’s where Megan Fox went.

p. 354 – The Seven Spiritual Laws of Superheroes HC:


Ooh, I sure hope the word “quantum” is thrown around a lot in this book.

p. 378 – Family Guy Slammers:


Saw the title for this solicitation, and thought, for one horrible moment, that this was actually an ad for Family Guy POGs. Maybe it’s just a non-sequitur reference to the years-ago POGs craze, but what are the chances of a Family Guy-related thing doing that?

p. 389 – Iggy Pop 7-Inch Action Figure:


“More lifelike than the real thing!”

p. 392 – Thor Movie Deluxe Series 2 Action Figures:


I suspect we’ll get some kind of explanation for what’s going on here eventually. Frankly, I’m not sure I want to know.

p. 397 – Doctor Who Weeping Angel Mini-Bust:


If you have any children in your household who are Doctor Who fans, this would be the worst thing to buy them. Trust me on this. Unless, of course, you don’t much like your kids.

p. 405 – Star Wars Silicon Trays Han Solo in Carbonite & R2D2:


These ice cube trays would go nicely with my refrigerator’s built-in crushed ice Hoth Snowscape simulator.

p. 411 – Seven Deadly Sins Resin Statues:


This’ll make Show ‘n’ Tell at the private Catholic school a whole lot more interesting.

p. 417 – Green Lantern Movie Paperweights:


Finally, I have a way to keep my copy of Green Lantern #1 (1941) from being blown off my desk by sudden gusts of wind! Because if it’s one thing comic fans are going to want a paperweight for….

p. 418 – Green Lantern Movie Projection Ring:


I think what I like most about this ring is just how understated it is, what with its ONE FOOT HEIGHT.

p. 433 – Green Lantern Saves Earth Movie Board Game:


Dude, spoiler warning, please!

p. 440 – Doctor Who The Movie Special Edition DVD:


For those of you who didn’t like this when it originally aired in 1995, here’s your chance to not like it again! (And too bad, gang…it’s canon!)

Marvel Previews p. 76 – Marvel Select Red Skull Movie Figure:


Well, it’s nice that Voldemort found work now that the Harry Potter movies are finished filming.

Marvel Previews p. 96 – Rocket Raccoon Guardian of the Keystone Quadrant Premiere HC:


You know, I’m pretty sure this is absolutely the last thing I expected Marvel to reprint in hardco…

p. 101 – Trouble by Mark Millar Premiere HC:


…hold on. Spoke too soon.

Oh, I’m pretty sure this could have been avoided.

§ March 2nd, 2011 § Filed under advertising § 15 Comments

So, believe it or not, I got my hands on two more boxes of 20+ year old comic book promo materials, and am currently unearthing even more wonderful delights of comics retail past…such as this item from the cover of Blackthorne Preview Magazine (February 1989):


For those of you too young to remember, or otherwise don’t know what this was all about, here you go:


You’re welcome.

Also in this Blackthorne Preview Magazine: an advertisement for the original comic book publication of Street Poet Ray (as pal Andrew discussed just the other day):


Some of the details are lost at that size, so click on it for a better look…if you dare.

« Older Entries Newer Entries »